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22 Things Brits Would Actually Hate About Living In Canada

What is this "football" you speak of?

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With the U.K. having just voted to #Brexit out of the European Union, sad Britons are threatening to move to Canada.

And while Canada is ***super flattered*** to be everyone's second choice (hi, Trump-fearing Americans!) there's some things you should really consider before coming here.
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And while Canada is ***super flattered*** to be everyone's second choice (hi, Trump-fearing Americans!) there's some things you should really consider before coming here.

1. We don't do that whole tea biscuits thing.

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2. They're called cookies.

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3. "Biscuits" are something you give to dogs.

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4. In fact we don't do tea time at all.

5. Frankly one sip of tea from our nation's favourite coffee shop will send you swimming back across the Atlantic.

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6. The Queen is still technically in charge.

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7. We don't have the ~Gulf Stream~ to keep things warm, so we have real winters basically across the whole country.

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8. Like, with snow.

@islandmorning Our shoveling dilemma in Summerside. Help!!!

9. And cold that does not fuck around.

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That was boiling water.

10. If you want that dreary weather you love so much, you'll have to move to Vancouver.

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11. And trust us, you can't afford to live there.

12. The French aren't separated by a whole channel.

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They're mostly in Quebec (and are very nice and will make you great poutine).

13. We like things such as spices, flavour, and colours other than brown in our foods.

(Sorry.)
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(Sorry.)

14. Our public broadcaster lacks the funding and amazing shows of the BBC.

BBC
BBC

15. (Although we bet you'd like Murdoch Mysteries.)

CBC

16. We don't call "football" football. Because it's soccer.

17. And our hooligans are hockey hooligans.

Avoid at all costs.
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Avoid at all costs.

18. Want to go through a ramble in the countryside?

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19. Nope. You'll probably get eaten by a bear.

Stay inside. Never leave.
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Stay inside. Never leave.

20. But frankly a Canada Goose will probably fuck you up first.

21. Rather than Lords, Ladies, and being in line for the throne, our class system is based on hockey stars and whether or not a person is also famous in the U.S.

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22. And finally, we're really close to America. But don't tell them we said that.

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