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17 Genuinely Heartbreaking And Shocking Things Celebs Revealed In Their Memoirs

Jodie Sweetin said that when she was 14 years old she drank two whole bottles of wine and threw up in the middle of Candace Cameron Bure's wedding before being carried out.

Note: Some examples include topics of drug use, addiction, and abuse.

1. In her memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died, Jennette McCurdy revealed that when her series Sam and Cat got canceled she was offered $300,000 as a “thank you gift” as long as she never spoke publicly about her experience at Nickelodeon.

close up of jenette

She turned down the "hush money" but admitted to second-guessing her decision. She wrote, “Nickelodeon is offering me three hundred thousand dollars in hush money to not talk publicly about my experience on the show? My personal experience of The Creator’s abuse? This is a network with shows made for children. Shouldn’t they have some sort of moral compass? Shouldn’t they at least try to report to some sort of ethical standard?”

jenette and her castmates on the show

2. In his book, Lucky Man: A Memoir, Michael J. Fox revealed that he almost died while filming Back to the Future Part III. Michael was nearly strangled to death during a stunt that required him to hang by a rope around his neck.

close up of michael

He explained that practices of the stunt had gone smoothly, but once it came time for shooting, he couldn't get his hands in the right place in time before the rope cut off his airway. He swung from the rope "unconscious" for "several seconds" before receiving help.

michael grabbing the rope around his neck

3. In his memoir, Trejo: My Life of Crime, Redemption, and Hollywood, Danny Trejo revealed that he met the infamous Charles Manson in prison and got hypnotized by him.

close of trejo

Back in 1961, when Danny was only 17, he was arrested and brought to the Los Angeles County jail, where Manson was also being held. He shared that in exchange for protection, Manson told his jail mates that he would take them through a guided meditation that would get them high without actually using any drugs.

manson surrounded by police

So, they sat down, closed their eyes, and the meditation began. "For 15 minutes, in great detail, he walked us through the process of copping the dope, finding a place to fix, cooking the heroin in a spoon, drawing it into a needle, and sticking it in our veins."

close up of manson

4. In his memoir, Will, Will Smith revealed that his first serious relationship was with a girl named Melanie, who cheated on him. As a way of coping with the betrayal, Will confessed to “homeopathic remedies of shopping and rampant sexual intercourse."

close up of will

Engaging in so much sex actually led Will to have a "psychosomatic reaction" to having an orgasm and he would "gag and sometimes even vomit."

old photo of will

He also shared that when he started dating his current wife, Jada Pinkett Smith, he immediately tried to "satisfy" her by having sex multiple times a day, every day for four straight months.

jada and will

5. Also in his book, Will Smith shared that because of his method acting for Six Degrees of Separation, he actually fell in love with his costar Stockard Channing. At the time, he had just welcomed a new baby with his then-wife, Sheree Zampino.

will and shree

He also explained that his marriage to Sheree was off to a "rocky start" because he found himself "desperately yearning to see and speak" to Stockard.

will and shree

6. In her memoir, This Will Only Hurt A Little, Busy Philipps revealed that she co-wrote the movie Blades of Glory with her then-boyfriend Craig Cox and his brother Jeff — she even wrote a role for herself to play. But when it came time to pitch the movie to producers, Craig and Jeff took Busy's name off the movie and sold it themselves.

close up of busy

She added that when she asked for credit on the movie Craig and Jeff told her she was "crazy" and rumors spread that she "stole ideas" from them. She said, "In order for them to do this insanely shitty thing to me, they vilified me and told me I was crazy. The story became that I was the one who had tried to STEAL ideas from them, that I was ALWAYS just looking out for myself. THEY had come up with this AMAZING STORY, and I was the less-than-talented girlfriend trying to glom on to their talent and carve out a piece for myself. A piece that I didn’t deserve. I had a hard time figuring out what was real.”

cast in the movie

Busy even ended up auditioning for the role she wrote for herself, but it went to Jenna Fisher. Luckily, word had gotten out about what really happened behind the scenes and Amy Poehler was on Busy's side. She said, “Amy Poehler grabbed me. ‘Girl,’ she said. ‘Seth Meyers told me the story of what those dudes did. FUCK ‘EM! You rock and are so talented. Come here! Sit at our table!!'”

busy at the movie premiere

7. In her first memoir, Little Girl Lost, Drew Barrymore revealed that the first time she'd ever tried smoking weed she was only 10 years old.

close up of drew

She said, "When I was ten and a half I was sitting in the back seat of a car driven by a friend’s mother. She started smoking pot. I’d wanted to try marijuana for a long time, but I was afraid that if I asked, she’d say, 'No way, Drew. You’re too young.' However, she offered me some and I said, 'Sure, I’ll try it.'"

close up of a young drew smiling

8. In her book, I'll Never Write My Memoirs, Grace Jones revealed that she actually used way less cocaine than what she was rumored to have used. However, when she did want to get high, she would take cocaine up her butt rather than snorting it.

close up of grace

She explained, "I preferred to put a rock up my ass rather than snort it. Sometimes it might get blown up there, one way or another. Then you get a very wonderful sexual feeling in your lower half. Stick a tiny little rock up your butt and it feels fantastic. The coke must be clean, of course. Very clean — that’s the word, more than 'pure.'"

grace jones in a suit

9. In her memoir, Melissa Explains It All, Melissa Joan Hart revealed that while she was on Sabrina The Teenage Witch she was also experimenting with weed, mushrooms, ecstasy, and mescaline. She went on to say that she had never "snorted or shot anything into [her] body."

melissa at an event

She added, "The one time I was offered coke, which happened to be by Paris Hilton, I turned it down." She even tells a story about the "third or fourth time" she dropped ecstasy and she ended up partying at the Playboy Mansion in LA and showed up hungover to a Maxim photoshoot the next morning.

a younger melissa on the red carpet

10. In her memoir, The Princess Diarist, Carrie Fisher revealed that she had an affair with Harrison Ford while filming their first Star Wars movie in the '70s. At the time, she was 19 and he was 33, married with two kids.

close up of debbie

She recalls the first time they slept together was after George Lucas’s 32nd birthday, in his studio car on their way back to London. She said, "A tug-of-war involving my wine-sodden virtue was underway, and I was unclear how it would turn out — but I realized who it was I wanted to win: my co-star, the one with the scar on his chin, the dialogue in his head and the gun in his belt — not now, just when in character, but still. After a mad scuffle, Mr. Ford threw my virtue and me into the back seat of his studio car and commanded the driver to 'Go! GO!' We went, followed by the crew."

harrison and debbie laughing together

She added that the affair went on for three months before she ended things and they "never again acknowledged that anything of that nature had occurred."

their characters about to kiss

11. In his memoir, I Am Ozzy, Ozzy Osbourne revealed that one night while he was on drugs he tried to kill his wife Sharon Osbourne and was arrested for attempted murder. He woke up the next morning in a jail cell not remembering what had happened the night before.

close up of ozzy

He wrote, "I used to black out a lot. And my biggest fear was waking up in a police cell and having an old lady say to a police officer, yes, that's the guy who ran my husband down, or that's the guy who hit my son over the head with an axe. It used to terrify me ... And then it happened — that day when I woke up in this little single cell with human shit up the walls — and I thought, what the fuck have I done now? Has one of my practical jokes backfired? So I asked a police officer. I said: 'What am I here for?' I hadn't got a fucking clue. It's the most horrific feeling. He read me a piece of paper, and said, 'You're charged with attempting to murder Mrs. Sharon Osbourne.' I can't tell you how I felt. I just went numb."

sharon and ozzy

12. In her memoir, Open Book, Jessica Simpson revealed she had an "emotional affair" with Johnny Knoxville that started on the set of Dukes Of Hazzard. At the time, Jessica was married to Nick Lachay and Johnny was married to Melanie Lynn Clapp.

close up of jessica

She explained that Johnny was one of the people she could be her "deepest authentic" self with and that he laughed with her, instead of at her. She even admitted to writing him love letters while her husband Nick was passed out in bed next to her.

jessica and johnny hosting. TRL

13. In her memoir, Troublemaker, Leah Remini revealed that children are constantly left on their own in Scientology. She explained, "In Scientology, minors are considered spiritual beings and not children in need of protection and guidance. You are the only one responsible for the condition of your life, regardless of your age. The Sea Org members believed that their kids could make up their own minds."

close up of leah

She said that some children were even forced out of their own homes, "As a result, these kids could no longer live with their parents... Even if that meant they ended up practically squatting, or sleeping in a stranger's apartment, their parents felt that it was the child's decision to make."

leah being interviewed

Leah also said that she'd witnessed several babies, including her sister Shannon, be neglected in the Sea Org's "nursery." She added, "'Nursery' was a charitable term for the motel room in the Quality Inn filled with cribs of crying, neglected babies, flies, and the smell of dirty diapers. The only ventilation came from a huge fan by the window... The person in charge was a kid like me, just some random teenage Sea Org member on post, who was hardly qualified to be taking care of children. Shannon was crying and soaked with urine in her crib...The neglect was overwhelming."

leah holding an award

14. In her memoir, Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny, Holly Madison shared the details of her first night living in the Playboy Mansion. She learned that having sex with Hugh Hefner was a requirement to live there and he even offered her a quaalude, saying, "In the '70s they used to call these pills 'thigh openers.'" She refused the drug but still got drunk.

close up up of holly

Tina Jordan, Hugh's No. 1 girlfriend at the time, brought Holly into his bedroom, which she explained was "like an episode of Hoarders." She recalled hardcore porn being played on two TV screens as Hugh masturbated to other girlfriends acting out lesbian scenes. Holly remembered being pushed towards Hugh as a girlfriend urged him to "be with the new girl." She wrote, "It was so brief that I can't even recall what it felt like beyond having a heavy body on top of mine."

hugh with three playboy girls

15. In her memoir, Finding Me, Viola Davis shared her experience growing up in extreme poverty in Central Falls, Rhode Island. She explained, “We were ‘po.’ That’s a level lower than poor."

viola smiling

She added that food stamps were never enough to feed her family and that none of the toilets in their home worked — she became "very skilled at filling up a bucket and pouring it into the toilet to flush it." She said that they would also go "unwashed" and could never go into their kitchen because "the rats had taken over." The apartment building she lived in had even caught fire several times.

viola doing an interview

16. In her memoir, unSweetined, Jodie Sweetin recalled dealing with her drug and alcohol addiction as a teenager. She revealed that she was "high as a kite" after snorting meth in a bathroom stall during the 2004 premiere of Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen's movie New York Minute.

jodie smiling

She also said in 1996 she had gotten so drunk at Candace Cameron Bure's wedding that she vomited and had to be carried out. She added, "I probably had two bottles of wine, and I was only 14. That first drink gave me the self-confidence I had been searching for my whole life. But that set the pattern of the kind of drinking that I would do."

jodie and candace at and event

17. Finally, in his memoir, Miss Memory Lane, Colton Haynes revealed that he almost lost his role on Teen Wolf after MTV found out he'd done a photo shoot for gay magazine, XY, as a teenager.

colton smiling

Before publicly coming out as gay in 2016, Colton was urged to stay silent about his sexuality. He even recalled an instance where a producer told him not to come out, or else he would lose jobs. He said, “It didn’t matter who was on my team, the message I got was always the same: ‘You will not work if you are yourself.’” However, Teen Wolf creator Jeff Davis fought to have Colton on the show.

colton on teen wolf wearing a jersey