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    Posted on Jan 29, 2015

    22 Things You Did When You First Got The Internet

    What's inside that pixellated can of worms?

    1. You dialed up to the world wide web with the utmost excitement. What treasures would await?

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    The dulcet tones of the dial-up sound rocketed you into a brave new world.

    2. But once online, all you could do was stare into the unknown chasm of the internet and think, "now what?"

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    3. You'd finally arrived online only to find that the whole thing was such a mystery.

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    4. Maybe you should just go to Waterstones and find a book about the internet.

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    5. Wait, there was a website address printed in the inlay of the last CD you bought...

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    ... why not type all three lines of it into the address bar and see what your favourite band are up to?

    6. Hands up anyone who then used the "contact us" page to tell huge bands that they loved them and should play in their town.

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    Both hands up if you sent said messages on

    7. How about asking Jeeves some of the burning questions that you've always wanted answered?

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    Always in the form of a full question, too: "Hey Jeeves, who really killed Kurt Cobain?".

    8. Unless, as a discerning internet n00b, you went for a more serious search engine.

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    LOL Dogpile.

    9. Searching for the lyrics to the title music of your favourite TV shows was a top priority.


    10. Time to make some new internet friends in one of those cool ~chatrooms~ you've heard about.

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    They won't all be full of weirdos, right?

    11. AOL or ICQ?

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    12. Or maybe you went straight to the Melody Maker forum and take the piss out of people who liked shitter bands than you.

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    13. It was MSN all the way if you wanted to talk to your IRL mates online, though.

    14. Until your parents ruined your conversation by picking up the phone and breaking the connection.

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    15. Creating an email address like "", was your chance to show the online world how cool you were.

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    And you blew your own mind the first time you emailied someone in another country. It's free! It's instant!

    16. If your friends didn't have email yet, you could go to a website and send them a text for free.

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    "I'm on the world wide web LOL!"

    17. Why buy music anymore when you could just download Napster?

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    18. Or just play your own using all those guitar tabs you'd printed out.

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    19. As soon as Metallica went and ruined Napster, you just downloaded Kazaa insead.

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    Shame it took about two years to download anything before it fucked up your computer entirely.

    20. Then you'd burn all the nu-metal songs you'd downloaded onto a CD.

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    Such a maverick.

    21. Don't pretend you didn't put a picture of yourself on Hot or Not.

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    And then boast about how high your rating was.

    22. The internet might have been a bit shit in the '90s, but chances are, you've not looked back since you first sipped from its poisoned chalice.

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