Tom Schwartz On "Vanderpump Rules" Has Honestly Always Been The Worst. Let's Review.

    Tom Schwartz is not always someone who is mentioned when we're thinking of worst Vanderpump Rules cast members — but he's definitely up there on the "low-key a monster" scale.

    Hello dear friends, and welcome. If you, like me, have been completely entranced by the reality show entitled Vanderpump Rules since it premiered on Bravo on January 7, 2013, then boy am I glad you are here.

    A cast photo from season one of VPR

    Vanderpump Rules Season 10 is currently airing every Wednesday night on Bravo. And you probably know by now, while this season is airing, a huge scandal broke out in real-time which revealed that cast mates Tom Sandoval and Raquel Leviss were carrying on a months-long affair. This revelation came with the knowledge that long-time couple on the show, Ariana Madix and Tom Sandoval, were no more, because he's a loser cheater face. (And honestly, thank god she's free of him, tbqfh.)

    Because as much as I would love to spend 15 hours straight discussing Tom Sandoval (or Tom #1), today we are here to discuss the OTHER Tom. Tom #2, if you will. Tom-othy Schwartz.

    Pictured: Tom Schwartz

    Tom Schwartz, aka Schwartzy — and tbh also sometimes known as Bubba — is considered somewhat of an OG in the Vanderpump Rules world. He was not technically an original full-time cast member when the show premiered in 2013, but he was a side character in Season 1 because he was in a relationship with main character and full-time cast member Katie Maloney. He became a full-time cast member in 2014. And since his day one appearance on the show, he has LITERALLY ALWAYS BEEN THE WORST.

    Screencap of Tom Schwartz from VPR

    So, without further ado, let's review the evidence. And then we can give him his flowers for being The Worst. ❤️

    Please note this is not by any means an exhaustive list because, quite frankly, I don't have 25 hours to dedicate to this, but it will cover some of his greatest hits. 

    1. Tom Schwartz started out being the worst very strongly when, in Season 1, he opted to pour an entire drink on friend, fellow cast mate, and BFF of his girlfriend Stassi Schroeder's head. (He also called her a bitch multiple times.) Why did he dump said beer? Because he was upset that Stassi was upset (??) that other cast-member (and ex-boyfriend) Jax Taylor showed up UNINVITED and UNANNOUNCED to her birthday party in Las Vegas.

    2. And in Season 2, he returned with his low-key kinda weird obsession with drink pouring on camera when he dumped his drink on then-girlfriend and "love of his life" Katie Maloney's head.

    A photo of Katie Maloney from Season 1 VPR


    3. At the beginning of Season 2, he also gets involved in a full-on-fight between James Kennedy and Tom Sandoval for no reason other than being The Fucking Worst.

    A screencap of Tom Schwartz from "Vanderpump Rules"

    4. He has always openly allowed his friends to talk terribly to his girlfriend/later wife. It's weird. Like in Season 3 when Jax Taylor goes on a rampage against Katie for allegedly "motorboating some guy's dick," and Tom Schwartz does quite literally nothing to defend his girlfriend. In fact, he actually blames HER for the disagreement and allows Jax to pummel her for entire scenes. Loser behavior.

    Screencap of Tom Schwartz from "Vanderpump Rules"

    5. He gave Katie — his long-time girlfriend, and person who told him "please don't ever give me a ring on a string" — a ring on a string. You can't make this up! Did he do this on purpose? I think so. :)

    A screencap of Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz from "Vanderpump Rules"

    6. And, as mentioned, Tom Schwartz is an admitted cheater. And like, he didn't just cheat once — not that once would even be excusable. No, the man cheated multiple times (and those are just the ones he admitted to in front of Bravo cameras). His dalliances have been the subject of storylines in both Seasons 3 and 6 to just name a few. And if that wasn't enough, he also openly admitted that he would never actually tell on his friends for cheating on their partners. Like, in Season 6, when Jax was caught sleeping with Faith, Schwartzy said, “I don’t know anything, but if I did, I wouldn’t say anything." At least he's honest about this one thing, I guess.

    Screencap from Vanderpump Rules

    7. He honestly generally seems to enjoy disrespecting women. Especially his partner, but it is certainly not limited to his partner. Like when he referred to Scheana Shay as a "bootleg Kardashian." Was it funny? Yes. Was it called for? Ehhhh.

    A photo of Tom Schwartz during an appearance on "Watch What Happens Live"

    8. Don't even get me started on the wedding season. But AFTER they somehow make it down the aisle, against everyone's better judgement, they go on a cast trip to Mexico in Season 7 (Episode 16), and Tom Schwartz *gleefully* tells his then-wife Katie Maloney that he "doesn't like the sound of her voice."

    A screencap from Season 7 of "Vanderpump Rules."

    9. Moving on. In Season 8, when other questionable human beings Randall Emmett and Jax Taylor decide to "play a prank" and have fake police officers show up and "arrest" Tom Sandoval, Katie voices her opinion (and actually says, "Turn on the news") that this prank was in poor taste. In an age when police brutality and violence against citizens — especially Black people — is widely publicized, it was in poor taste. But how does her husband respond to Katie's (very valid) opinion? By immediately telling her to shut up, of course!

    10. Fast-forward to early 2022, specifically March, and Katie and Tom's divorce is announced. People (me) celebrated. And Schwartz uploads his little announcement which essentially boils down to: Katie dumped me, and I’m so sad about it, and I don't really get why** but I guess I can’t blame her, but you guys in the comments probably still should. He even goes so far as to say, "I'm not the victim." Sweetie, I promise we already knew that.

    11. Which brings us to this CURRENT season, Season 10, of him STILL BEING THE FUCKING WORST 10 YEARS LATER. Exhibit A: Tom Schwartz making out with Raquel Leviss after Katie asked him repeatedly not to.

    A screencap of Raquel and Tom Schwartz kissing on "Vanderpump Rules"

    12. After disrespecting Katie (yet again...) by going against her (very valid) wishes of him not hooking up with someone *inside their friend group* he goes on Watch What Happens Live and refers to Katie as "a nightmare of a human being.” Katie responded, and sadly, she wasn't surprised. And neither was I.

    I was called a monster too many times to count… tonight’s #wwhl didn’t phase me. Sadly.

    Twitter: @MusicKillsKate

    13. And then, there's the whole him definitely knowing about the Raquel Leviss and Tom Sandoval affair and wanting people who see Sandoval IRL to "GIVE HIM A HUG!" Lmao.

    You’re the only that wants to hug him dude. READ THE ROOM!!!

    Twitter: @MusicKillsKate

    14. Thankfully, in one of the recent episodes that aired on April 12, 2023, Katie Maloney told Schwartz exactly what she feels, and I found myself leaping for joy.

    Schwartz reached a new level of low. He literally kisses Raquel, fully knowing that Katie didn’t like that, then gaslights her into making it seem like she’s crazy for something he had agreed not to do. He deserved every single bad thing she said about him 😡 #pumprules

    Twitter: @queensofbravo

    After Schwartz made out with Raquel, he showed up (uninvited) to Katie's dinner, ate her FUCKING SUSHI!!!, and then pretended like everything was fine. So, Katie said, "Get the fuck out of my face. I think you're pathetic, I think you're a drunk, and I think you're a loser." AND, MY FRIENDS, SHE IS RIGHT!!!!

    Luckily, I am clearly not alone in my feelings of disgust toward this man. See here:

    Schwartz admitting that he only kissed Raquel to piss off Katie is the most honest thing he’s ever said on this show. #PumpRules

    Twitter: @sur_rules

    And here:

    “Get the fuck out of my face. I think you’re pathetic. I think you’re a drunk and I think you’re a loser.” GET HIM KATIE! Get his ass for me, get him again! Schwartz is the BIGGEST loser right now and that’s saying something considering Sandoval exists 😮‍💨 #PumpRules

    Twitter: @dailybravomail

    And here:

    Schwartz whenever Katie is out to dinner #PumpRules #VanderpumpRules

    Twitter: @trinawatters

    So, there you have it. This concludes my case for just some of the reasons why Tom Schwartz deserves more credit on Vanderpump Rules for being the fucking worst. Thanks for reading!

    Photo of Tom Schwartz

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