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21 Things You Learn The First Time You Visit NYC

I visited NYC for the FIRST TIME EVER last week. This is what I learned.

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1. The entire state of New York waits in line for a taxi at the airport.

The ENTIRE state. Fact.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

The ENTIRE state. Fact.

2. You don't need anything else to survive besides New York pizza.

Which is cool since it's SO CHEAP.
Flickr: randar / Via Creative Commons

Which is cool since it's SO CHEAP.

3. You can't actually hail a cab by yelling at it.

They literally cannot hear you.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

They literally cannot hear you.

4. Once you DO hail a cab, let it be known that cab drivers don't like small talk.

Via giphy.com

"You must know all the terminals by heart now! haha! That must be cool." —Me

"No." —Cab driver

5. On trash night, there is literal trash everywhere you look.

PILES OF TRASH. Welcome to New York.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

PILES OF TRASH. Welcome to New York.

6. People will NOT move out of the way when you walk past them.

Bruised shoulders are SO NY.
Flickr: ennuipoet / Via Creative Commons

Bruised shoulders are SO NY.

7. Rats live in NYC, too.

And people there act like it ISN'T EVEN A THING. "Yeah, rats live here." OH, OK.
Flickr: 39908901@N06 / Via Creative Commons

And people there act like it ISN'T EVEN A THING. "Yeah, rats live here." OH, OK.

8. You should wear walking shoes.

And by walking shoes I don't mean your fairly new combat boots that need breaking in, LARA.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

And by walking shoes I don't mean your fairly new combat boots that need breaking in, LARA.

9. The hotels will break your bank and will be the size of a closet.

Don't even try to watch TV, you won't be able to see it.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

Don't even try to watch TV, you won't be able to see it.

10. You shouldn't drink the water in the hotel room because it isn't free.

EVEN IF YOU JUST WALKED 13 BLOCKS AND YOU ARE PARCHED. They don't care.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

EVEN IF YOU JUST WALKED 13 BLOCKS AND YOU ARE PARCHED. They don't care.

11. You don't have to wait for the walk sign to cross the street.

And you shouldn't if you want to get where you're going at a reasonable time.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

And you shouldn't if you want to get where you're going at a reasonable time.

12. Tourists LOVE squirrels and will spend at least 30 minutes staring at them and throwing food at their round little bellies.

And sometimes they even TOUCH the squirrels.
Caroline Moss

And sometimes they even TOUCH the squirrels.

13. You have to purchase a card to get on the subway and people will get annoyed with you when you don't understand how to buy it and end up taking 20 minutes.

It's not MY fault that they wouldn't take a 20.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

It's not MY fault that they wouldn't take a 20.

14. The subway is very crowded and smells like feet, coffee, and urine.

And it lurches A LOT so it's pretty difficult to take a selfie.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

And it lurches A LOT so it's pretty difficult to take a selfie.

15. Central Park is HUGE and you can definitely get lost while staring at the oddly green-colored water.

And get run over by joggers. And feel bad about yourself because of all the people doing workouts.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

And get run over by joggers. And feel bad about yourself because of all the people doing workouts.

16. Shake Shack has a better burger than In-N-Out.

I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry.

17. You have to wait HOURS in line for something called a cronut that will DEFINITELY make your stomach hurt.

Cronut = croissant and doughnut. I KNOW, RIGHT?
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

Cronut = croissant and doughnut. I KNOW, RIGHT?

18. You shouldn't buy an "I <3 NYC" T-shirt if you want to fit in.

friends don&#x2019;t let friends make bad decisions RT @laraeparker: No one will let me buy an &#x22;I &#x2764;&#xFE0F; NYC&#x22; shirt :(

Sam Stryker@sbstrykerFollow

friends dont let friends make bad decisions RT @laraeparker: No one will let me buy an "I NYC" shirt :(

8:19 PM - 19 Oct 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

19. There is literally nowhere better to experience fall weather.

Probably/most definitely a fact.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

Probably/most definitely a fact.

20. You'll smile 1,000 time a day because everyone in NYC is GORGEOUS.

Gods and goddesses among us mere mortals.
Lara Parker for BuzzFeed

Gods and goddesses among us mere mortals.

21. And Carrie Bradshaw was living a damn lie.

Because her closet was bigger than my hotel room.
HBO

Because her closet was bigger than my hotel room.

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