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    Updated on Oct 24, 2019. Posted on Aug 26, 2019

    22 Unrealistic Things Women Always Seem To Do In Straight Porn

    We never need lube! We're always wet!!!

    by ,

    What's up world, Crystal and Lara here, and we are aware that people watch porn. We ourselves have watched it a time or two (or a hundred) and while it can often be enjoyable, it can also sometimes...not be. A large part of this is because the depiction of sex or women having sex in a lot of mainstream porn is often unrealistic and just downright offensive.

    Universal Pictures

    So we compiled a list of the the ways in which porn is unrealistic. We're sure we've missed some so feel free to let us know in the comments!

    1. We are *constantly* moaning. Nothing feels that good.

    Columbia Pictures

    2. And not only are we constantly moaning, but we're moaning super loudly.

    Channel 9 / Via tenor.com

    3. We never need lube! We're always wet!!!

    Comedy Central / Via Comedy Central

    4. And once we're wet, we're obviously able to stay wet for like 29 minutes straight!

    Columbia Pictures

    5. We experience extreme pleasure just from penetration alone. Fingering? Oral? Nah. Just give us that D exclusively, baby.

    Giphy / Via giphy.com

    6. We don't need any sort of foreplay. We're ready to DIVE. RIGHT. IN.

    New Line Cinema

    7. And we are always ready to go when the fuck ever — whether you're at work or outside in the woods!

    HBO

    8. We're almost never wearing underwear.

    MTV

    9. But when we are wearing underwear, it's sexy as fuck, obviously. Who cares if it's uncomfortable and riding up our asshole?

    20th Century Fox

    10. We have zero gag reflexes!

    New Line Cinema / Via New Line Cinema

    11. And we definitely don't have any TMJ-related issues. We can give head for hours!

    HBO

    12. And while we're giving head for hours on end, we can moan the entire time, too. It's a true talent.

    Cinamour Entertainment

    13. We can have sex in literally any position, no problem. Don't worry, you don't have to put my legs back down from around my head, I won't get a muscle strain!!!

    New Line Cinema

    14. All of us possess acrobatic abilities. We can do a backflip right onto a 6-foot-tall dude's face

    MGM/UA Distribution Co.

    15. And we almost always have heels ready to go to wear during sex! Super-high, hot ones, too.

    NBC

    16. We never struggle with anal. Stick it right in, baby!

    New Line Cinema

    17. And don't worry, we can totally come over and be ready to get down to business whenever, wherever. Forget work! Forget responsibilities! We're on our way.

    Gramercy Pictures

    18. Our knees never get chafed from the rug or other rough surfaces. We have perfect knees. We experience zero pain.

    ABC

    19. Our vaginas/vulvas never get sore from being penetrated by multiple people (or things) in a short period of time. We're totally fine, thanks for asking!

    View Askew Productions

    20. We rarely ever have pubic hair.

    @holychild / Via giphy.com

    21. And if we do, it is perfectly manicured.

    Paramount Pictures

    22. And we always, always have the perfect dress that slips right off. There's no having to take off jeans and then also underwear and a camisole and a shirt, etc. That's way too much work!

    HBO