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BuzzFeed Proven To Cause Disease

OMG ITS PROVEN FACT NOW, BUZZFEED, PREPARE TO BE EXPOSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Looking into the cells of Common Buzzfeed Sprequillum, it has been shown that it contains strains of diabetes, overeating of lemons, and massive intestinal explosion. Doctors such as Professor Timothy Wiseau have accepted this as true fact, now teaching it to his many disciples at the College of Renovation of Modern Philosophy and Medicine. He states "... a mere glance at any Buzzfeed article can be found to enduce profuse vomiting and pink eye in the ear..." and also, "Buzzfeed has prepared its poison prepared to wipe out this species as we know it."Come back next week for a sit-down interview with Timothy Wiseau himself.

Looking into the cells of Common Buzzfeed Sprequillum, it has been shown that it contains strains of diabetes, overeating of lemons, and massive intestinal explosion. Doctors such as Professor Timothy Wiseau have accepted this as true fact, now teaching it to his many disciples at the College of Renovation of Modern Philosophy and Medicine. He states "... a mere glance at any Buzzfeed article can be found to induce profuse vomiting and pink eye in the ear..." and also, "Buzzfeed has prepared its poison prepared to wipe out this species as we know it." Those who are known to have come in contact (either visual or physical) are being held in numerous containment sights around the globe including, China, Taiwan, Indonesia, Austria, and every major exporting country in the Eastern hemisphere. Doctors suggest little to no contact, saying "I would rather die than come into any contact, which I shall do if it ever happens to me." Stay away at any means necessary, even if it means utter species annihilation and separation from loved ones. From one of our containment sites, scientist Theodore Wiseau says "It is becoming hard to contain this mess, the patients are all in critical condition and showing no signs of healing, we might have to abandon this one and move this one to the large containment center in Sacramento, California and determine where we need to go from there." Come back next week for a sit-down interview with Timothy Wiseau himself. The Apocalypse is coming, prepare yourselves...

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