1. EXHIBIT A: In their Thanksgiving night game against the Patriots, the Jets trail 14-0. Then Mark Sanchez runs into Brandon Moore’s ass, fumbles, and the Pats take it for a score.
2. Your eyes did not deceive you: he fumbles because he runs into his teammate’s butt.
3. Look into Mark Sanchez’s eyes and see pure, weapons-grade existential angst.
4. EXHIBIT B: On the ensuing kickoff, Joe McKnight gets nailed. He fumbles. Julian Edelman catches it in midair. Touchdown. Pats lead 28-0.
5. Pity poor Rex Ryan. Also, if you know of any job openings, please shoot him an email.
6. Here’s video of the whole dilapidated mess. By the time you’re reading this, the Patriots probably lead by 300. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.
- The chairman of the National Governors Association, said Trump has promised only criminals will deported and random spot checks won't be conducted.
- The trans sister of a Trump inauguration singer must be allowed to use the restroom that fits her gender ID, a judge ruled.
- The suspect in a Kansas shooting that left an Indian man dead thought he was shooting Iranians, and the FBI is investigating as a possible hate crime.
- Elon Musk announced that his SpaceX company will send two tourists around the moon by 2018 🚀🌝