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Sep 17, 2013

The "New Girl" Drinking Game

You love True American, but you need something that you can actually play while New Girl is on.

Here's what you need:

• Several cans of the cheapest beer (because you have the credit score of a homeless ghost).

• An inability to dance or sing.

• A recycling bin, for your empty pawns and soldiers.


1. To start: Everyone shotguns a beer. The first person to finish and chuck their can in the recycling bin is the SCHMIDT-MEISTER.

Whenever Schmidt makes a pun on his name, refers to himself in the third person, has to put money in the douche bag jar, makes a comment on his clothes, or does anything uniquely Schmidtty...the Schmidt-Meister points to someone and makes them drink.

2. Whenever Nick Miller makes a face: Everyone yells, "IT'S NICK MILLER TIME" and takes a sip.


3. Whenever any character is in the bathroom: The floor becomes hot lava. Last person with their feet on the floor takes a drink.

4. Whenever Winston puts someone in their place: Sing, "I think I'll trrryyyy defying graaavity!"

5. Whenever anyone breaks out in dance: Do three fist pumps, take a drink.

6. Whenever Nick Miller puts himself down: Yell, "BOOOO!"

7. Jess makes a pathetic insult: Drink three times.

8. When Nick and Jess are romantically awkward: Cuddle the person next to you.


9. When Jess sings while talking, everyone must sing the next thing they say. Anyone messes up: EVERYONE TAKES A DRINK.


10. Anybody reminisces about something in the past: Take two drinks.

11. If any character starts getting drunk and weird: Take a drink to catch up.


12. When any of the guys is excited about a stupid idea: Drink until it seems like a good one.

13. When the stupid idea goes horribly wrong: Waterfall, starting with the Schmidt-Meister.

14. Any reference to fat Schmidt: The Schmidt-Meister finishes his drink, everyone else sings "We Built This Schmidty."


Payback is Schmidt.

Tune in to the Season 3 premiere on Tuesday, Sept. 17, at 9 p.m. ET on Fox!

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