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17 Stupidly Wonderful Clothing Items You Can Actually Buy This Fall

For when you want a sweater that doubles as a straightjacket.

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1. Thakoon Vested Cape, $690

https://www.shopbop.com/vested-cape-thakoon-addition/vp/v=1/1555899365.htm?folderID=2534374302066271&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=35766
https://www.shopbop.com/vested-cape-thakoon-addition/vp/v=1/1555899365.htm?folderID=2534374302066271&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=35766

Leo: I think there was a mix-up at the factory.

Kristin: "I'm sorry, ma'am, we weren't able to save the denim jacket, the flannel was just... [sniff] too far advanced."

2. Nasty Gal "So Over It" Layered Cape Sweater, $68

Kristin: OH I GET IT, it's called "so over it" because the poncho is over the dress. WOW COOL. Leo: I thought it was about knitwear just being over society's definitions of what is or isn't a sweater.
Via nastygal.com

Kristin: OH I GET IT, it's called "so over it" because the poncho is over the dress. WOW COOL.

Leo: I thought it was about knitwear just being over society's definitions of what is or isn't a sweater.

Leo: It's OK, she'll grow into it.

Kristin: If I wore this, those sleeves would just be covered in food.

Leo: I have a feeling Uncle Fester would feel quite comfortable in this number.

Kristin: Yeah, this is what you wear when you're actually just three kids stacked on top of each other trying to get a drink at the bar.

5. Nasty Gal Let's Shred Turtleneck Sweater, $88

Kristin: Now THIS is a woman who owns cats!Leo: This sweater is basically representative of every New Year’s resolution ever: It starts out great and then slowly falls to pieces.
Via nastygal.com

Kristin: Now THIS is a woman who owns cats!

Leo: This sweater is basically representative of every New Year’s resolution ever: It starts out great and then slowly falls to pieces.

http://openingceremony.us/products.asp?menuid=2&menuid2=5&designerid=1627&productid=150705&sproductid=150707&color=MEDIUM%20WASH&size=XS/S
http://openingceremony.us/products.asp?menuid=2&menuid2=5&designerid=1627&productid=150705&sproductid=150707&color=MEDIUM%20WASH&size=XS/S

Leo: Official uniform of the Sing Sing All-Stars.

Kristin: What is going on here? Is this a kid whose parents forbid her from wearing denim, and so she's way overcompensating to get back at them? "THE LEVI'S FACTORY AND I ARE IN LOVE, DAD."

7. American Retro Mohair Pants, $579

Leo: Oooh! Mohair! I remember when I had a real mohair moment in the late '90s.Kristin: If you buy these, can you literally sit anywhere in NYC? Like, does it become more or less impossible to put you butt down on any public surface without ruining them?
nastygal.com

Leo: Oooh! Mohair! I remember when I had a real mohair moment in the late '90s.

Kristin: If you buy these, can you literally sit anywhere in NYC? Like, does it become more or less impossible to put you butt down on any public surface without ruining them?

8. Opening Ceremony & Magritte "Ladder of Fire" Sweatshirt, $119

Leo: Fashion for when you want to fade into oblivion.Kristin: This is actually the best Tinder photo I have ever seen.
Via openingceremony.us

Leo: Fashion for when you want to fade into oblivion.

Kristin: This is actually the best Tinder photo I have ever seen.

9. Forever 21 Flared Chevron-Striped Pants, $12.90

Kristin: DISCO TIGER TO THE RESCUE. Leo: I think this outfit might be a portal to another dimension.
Via forever21.com

Kristin: DISCO TIGER TO THE RESCUE.

Leo: I think this outfit might be a portal to another dimension.

10. Forever 21 Squad Goals T-Shirt, $15.90

Kristin: So your squad goals is just yourself? That's like wearing a T-shirt that just has the words "Football Team."Leo: Agree, this would make more sense if it read "squad goalie."Kristin: Because at least then we know her position in the squad.
Via forever21.com

Kristin: So your squad goals is just yourself? That's like wearing a T-shirt that just has the words "Football Team."

Leo: Agree, this would make more sense if it read "squad goalie."

Kristin: Because at least then we know her position in the squad.

11. Jacquemus Le Manteau Mecano, $1,045

Kristin: She looks like the headstrong daughter of a coat who fell in love with a shoe.

Leo: This is basically what happens anytime I buy a pair of shoes and they come unlaced.

12. Zhivago "The Risen One" Sequin Dress, $508

Kristin: "Sorry it took me so long to get here, I got into a fight with some protective furniture pads."Leo: I feel like this lady’s name is Zorp and she’s the Giselle of an alien colony famous for its emerald treasures.
Via nastygal.com

Kristin: "Sorry it took me so long to get here, I got into a fight with some protective furniture pads."

Leo: I feel like this lady’s name is Zorp and she’s the Giselle of an alien colony famous for its emerald treasures.

https://www.shopbop.com/candy-floss-wrap-scarf-charlotte/vp/v=1/1575495831.htm?folderID=2534374302207430&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=11236
https://www.shopbop.com/candy-floss-wrap-scarf-charlotte/vp/v=1/1575495831.htm?folderID=2534374302207430&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=11236

Leo: The DIY version of this would just be to get a remnant of shag carpeting and wrap it around your neck.

Kristin: This looks like someone who paid $50,000 to hunt Sesame Street characters in the wild.

14. Spiritual Gangster Logo Beanie, $35

https://www.shopbop.com/logo-beanie-spiritual-gangster/vp/v=1/1525231844.htm?folderID=2534374302207430&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=22217
https://www.shopbop.com/logo-beanie-spiritual-gangster/vp/v=1/1525231844.htm?folderID=2534374302207430&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=22217

Leo: "Spiritual Gangster"? So is that like, Jesus?

Kristin: A spiritual gangster is anyone who tries to sell you magic crystals for $40 and then laughs their stupid hat off all the way to the bank.

https://www.shopbop.com/macdougal-tent-booties-marc-by/vp/v=1/1541285054.htm?folderID=33279&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=34594
https://www.shopbop.com/macdougal-tent-booties-marc-by/vp/v=1/1541285054.htm?folderID=33279&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=34594

Leo: I think 20 years ago, this is what we thought people of the future would legitimately be wearing. (AND NOW WE ARE! IS YOUR MIND BLOWN?) They do look rather cozy, though.

Kristin: If you need this much protection from the elements, WHY ARE YOU WEARING AN ANKLE BOOTIE?

https://www.shopbop.com/maya-poncho-christophe-sauvat-collection/vp/v=1/1505528569.htm?folderID=2534374302066271&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=12867
https://www.shopbop.com/maya-poncho-christophe-sauvat-collection/vp/v=1/1505528569.htm?folderID=2534374302066271&fm=other-shopbysize-viewall&os=false&colorId=12867

Leo: Winter: It's all about bathing yourself in mountains of sequins.

Kristin: I can die now that I know what Joan Collins would look like if she were bitten by a radioactive spider.

17. To Be Adored Aga Velvet Dress, $310

Kristin: That face when the Puritans are totally right about you being a witch but you don't really give a fuck.Leo ::Steps off Mayflower:: “Helloooooo New World, I’m fabulouuuuuusss!"
Via nastygal.com

Kristin: That face when the Puritans are totally right about you being a witch but you don't really give a fuck.

Leo ::Steps off Mayflower:: “Helloooooo New World, I’m fabulouuuuuusss!"

The best things at three price points