Christmas Then Vs. Now

When did Christmas become so much work and responsibility?!

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2. Christmas music, as a kid: There are a bunch of old Christmas songs that are OK, and then this one REALLY AWESOME MARIAH CAREY SONG.

As an adult: Seriously, how has NO ONE written another top 40 Christmas song in 20 years?

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Beyonce drops new album in December with no catchy Christmas bangers, this is inexcusable. Please help us, Bey.

3. Buying presents, as a kid: Getting money from dad, so that you can buy a present for mom.

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Everyone gets little stuff from the "Christmas store" that comes to your elementary school. Everything you buy everyone is adorable!

4. Christmas fears, as a child: Santa (or your parents) will figure out that bad thing you did, and Christmas will be utterly ruined.

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Look, Santa: my 5 year old interest in dog poop is STRICTLY scientific. You know who else was shunned for their controversial work? GALILEO.

As an adult: Dying alone, or even worse, that your S.O. will realize that you are a bad thing for them, and break up with you right before Christmas.

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You really wish they'd learned about your weird hobbies BEFORE you bought their present.

6. Decorations, as a kid: These go up a month or two early.

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Your parents knew how long it took to put up all those damn decorations, so they wanted to get as much use out of them as possible.

As an adult: Waiting in line at the mall FOREVER for a new iPhone or to return a sweater. That's all you want, why is it so hard?

As an adult: I don't care who is dying, literally nothing is happening until coffee and food happens.

Look, kids: You're going to be much less mad about all the ugly sweaters you got if you open them up on full tummies.