Buzz·Posted on Oct 18, 2013Buying Plus-Size Clothes: Expectations Vs. RealityAll we want is for someone to shut up and take our money. Is that so hard?by Kristin ChiricoBuzzFeed StaffFacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink Expectation: With a little elbow grease, you can find plenty of tasteful things that flatter your body. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com Reality: You will find lots of stuff that emphasizes your boobs. wtfplus.tumblr.com wtfplus.tumblr.com closet.gwynniebee.com Or attempts to draw the eyes...elsewhere. Via pinterest.com Or tries to disguise you in a confusing print. wtfplus.tumblr.com wtfplus.tumblr.com wtfplus.tumblr.com Evening Wear Expectations: Surely, you will be able to find something adorable to hit the town with. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com Reality: You will find lots of tents. Via wtfplus.tumblr.com Like a goddamn denim circus. Or ridiculous animal prints and cheap fabric. Via wtfplus.tumblr.com H&M Expectations: H&M offers plus sizes now! That means I will be able to find H&M clothes in my size! I will have dozens of options! Via hm.com H&M Reality: Having literally ones of options. Via hm.com Expectation: When you size up, the clothes will fit you correctly. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via gemini-dragon-gifs.tumblr.com Reality: Your clothes will now fit one specific part of you correctly. Via blogger.com It will somehow manage to fit you poorly in every other way possible. You will now literally look like a sad sack. Mall Expectations: You love shopping and you love your friends, and the mall will have both! Therefore, you love the mall. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com Reality: There is only one store for you there, and it is seriously depressing. Via imgur.com If you try to shop in it, you will spend 30 minutes in a dressing room trying on pants that don't fit well before you give up, half naked. You hate the mall. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com You will feel like someone who has swum too far out into the ocean and is now too exhausted to swim back. Bra Expectations: Everyone loves big boobs. Surely you will be able to find some bras to accomodate our universal love of big boobs. Via imgur.com Reality: Need a bra for any size higher than triple D? Good luck with that. Via glassdoor.com Summer Dresses Expectation: Bring on the breezy comfort, 'cause it's flauntin' season. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com Reality: Bring on the terrible patterns and loud colors and looking like you just rolled around in a children's birthday party. Via closet.gwynniebee.com Online Shopping Expectation: There are so many online retailers! Surely you can find clothes that are on trend. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via giphy.com Reality: You will find clothes that are horrible mash-ups of trends. zulily.com forever21.com Range of Selection Expectations: Look at all these thumbnails of dresses! Surely there will be something for me! Via closet.gwynniebee.com Reality: The thumbnails are actually hiding horrible details, which become immediately clear once I zoom in. Via closet.gwynniebee.com Unless I want to go as Unnecessarily Distracting Co-Worker for Halloween. Expectation: It will not be all that hard to find fun, interesting separates that go together. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Via wac.3945.edgecastcdn.net Reality: You will find ugly separates modeled by pretty people who will distract you from how IRL ugly their clothes are. Via wtfplus.tumblr.com Modcloth Expectations: Oh, thank God, Modcloth sells plus-size clothes. I buy all of them and am cute forever. Via modcloth.com Modcloth Reality: H&M prices, these are not. Via hemsforher.com My rent check is probably not clearing this month.