1.I got a T-shirt with a picture of my boyfriend on it that had a poem on the back detailing how awesome and sweet he was.
2.I was about to move eight hours away for a life-saving lung transplant and was on oxygen 24/7. My boyfriend of four years bought me jeans because he was tired of me “not caring about my appearance” and wanted me to dress nicer.
3.My first boyfriend in high school gave me a shoebox (not wrapped or anything, just an old shoebox) filled with latex condoms (I’m allergic to latex) and lube. That was it.
4.My boyfriend drew me pictures of people having sex in different positions. It was awkward.
5.I got a used, stained coffee mug and a tiny box of chocolates that were drawn all over with marker. I thought it was cute until I noticed that the scribbles were covering writing that said, "Happy Valentines Day, Love Grandma."
6.All I got was an E-Card that said, “Just remember, this Valentine's Day, blow jobs are like flowers for men.” Then he showed up two hours late for our Valentine's date.
7.My ex gave me a handful of seeds. He said he was allergic to flowers, so I could grow my own. They weren’t even in a bag or anything, he took them out of his pocket!
8.I got a teddy bear that said, "Who's your daddy?"
9.My boyfriend of four years printed out 12 red roses on printer paper and laid them out on the floor...and that was it. No note, just 12 pieces of paper.
10.My ex gave me a bike, which is actually a very nice present, except that I already had one that I liked. He just gave me the new one because he thought my current bike was “too masculine.” He also refused to spend any time with me that day because he had gotten me “such an expensive present.”
11.My ex got me knee-high striped socks because he said I’d look sexy in them. I thought it was kind of cute until he bought a nearly identical (but slightly racier) pair for his “platonic” friend for her birthday.
12.My ex made us dinner reservations at a nice steakhouse which he cancelled. To try to make up for it, he wrote me a note and SPELLED MY NAME WRONG. We had been together over a year.
13.My ex got me a package of medjool dates with a note that read, "Here's some dates because I know you'll never be able to get any others from anyone else."
14.I saw a teddy bear and a dozen roses on the counter at home and got super excited, thinking my bf was surprising me. When he walked in, I hugged him and said, “Oh babe, how sweet! I love them!” He goes, “Oh...the UPS guy couldn’t get our neighbor to answer, so he asked if I could give those to them when they got home. They’re not for you.” (He didn't get me anything.)
15.My ex bf gave me a card with weird stick figure drawings of two people at arms length doing the awkward middle school dance. Above the two figures were our names with little arrows pointing to our "respective figures," saying, “Sidney and Alex = great friends.”
16.My ex boyfriend broke up with me on Valentine’s Day by writing an article about me in the local newspaper. My entire family read details about our relationship that I never wanted anyone to know.
17.My ex got me frozen flowers he stole from a local cemetery.
18.My boyfriend at the time thought it would be funny to send me a "Get Well Soon" balloon at school. Instead of spending the day feeling special, I got continually asked what was wrong with me and if I was OK.
19.My high school boyfriend gave me a used dog toy of a dolphin.
20.My now ex picked me up in a limo, took me to the fanciest hotel in town, wined and dined me all V-day weekend. When he brought me back home via limo, he says to me, "Oh, your half of the cost is $450...can you write me a check?"
21.My ex gave me a candle/lotion set that I gave his mom for Christmas.
22.My ex gave me chocolate and roses, which sounds sweet, except he knew I was super allergic to roses and lactose intolerant.
23.I got chocolates from the dollar store...and my boyfriend had eaten most of them before he gave them to me.
24.For Valentine’s Day, I received a care package from my ex and it contained fake flowers, cotton candy, and a letter stating that he wanted to break up.
25.The worst Valentine's Day present I ever got was finding out I was a married man's side chick!
26.I didn't get anything because my ex boyfriend's birthday was on Valentine's day. He said that was his day.
27.I got a 24-pack of instant oatmeal.
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