How Slytherin Are You?

Not everybody has what it takes.

  1. Check any of the following where the answer is yes.

    1. Were you sorted into Slytherin?
    2. Do you have friends in high places?
    3. Is that friend your dad or another family member?
    4. Do you look good in every shade of green?
    5. Are you luscious locks ***flawless?
    6. Have you ever said Weasley in a derisive tone?
    7. Is your family name ominous as fuck?
    8. Have you ever thought about abandoning that family name and making it on your own?
    9. Do you like animals that have no legs?
    10. Do you dream about world domination?
    11. Do you daydream about world domination?
    12. Do you actively try and shift your reality to achieve world domination?
    13. Have you ever called anyone a mudblood?
    14. Have you ever been punched in the face for calling someone a mudblood?
    15. Do you have minions?
    16. Minions that can read?
    17. Do you look out for your people?
    18. Even if they are minions?
    19. Do people constantly underestimate you?
    20. Do you use people’s misconceptions of you to ruthless destroy them?
    21. Is smashing the patriarchy a frequent activity that you participate in?
    22. Is ignoring the haters a frequent activity you participate in?
    23. Is trolling a frequent activity you participate in?
    24. Do you over identify with anti-heroes?
    25. Do you over identify with villains?
    26. Has your laugh ever been described as maniacal or vaguely threatening?
    27. Do you always have a plan?
    28. Do you always have backup plan?
    29. Are you willing to break the rules for the right reasons?
    30. Is ‘the right reasons’ mostly a euphemism for people that you love?
    31. Do you like to pretend that nobody sees through that euphemism?
    32. Do you know someone with a Dark Mark?
    33. Do you have a Dark Mark?
    34. Would you survive a post-apocalyptic world?
    35. Were you the cause of this post-apocalyptic world?
    36. Would you rule a post-apocalyptic world with an iron fist?
    37. Can you figure out what makes a person tick easily?
    38. Is it hard for others to slip things past you?
    39. Do you own a leather jacket?
    40. Do you own multiple leather jackets?
    41. Are you best at everything you do?
    42. If someone starts a fight with you, do you finish it?
    43. With cutting, scathing words and insights that crush your opponent and their incorrect world views?
    44. By calculating all of your tactical advantages before striking?
    45. By tattling?
    46. Do you love taking selfies?
    47. Do people frequently describe you as unapologetic?
    48. Is your self-confidence at Beyonce levels or higher?
    49. Are you allergic to stupidity?
    50. Do you find yourself saying, “oh, honey……” a lot?
    51. Can you often be found surrounded by (e)books?
    52. Can you think your way out of complex situations given enough time and resources?
    53. Do you value your mind over all your other assets?
    54. Would you do anything for the people you loved?
    55. Even if it meant sacrificing yourself?
    56. If someone you loved was taken from you, would you stop at nothing to exact revenge?
    57. Do you frequently indulge in revenge fantasies?
    58. Do your exes fear your wrath?
    59. Have you ever talked yourself out of ticket?
    60. Have you ever been arrested?
    61. Do authority figures often find themselves wrapped around your little finger?
    62. Can you see through other people’s bullshit easily?
    63. Do you sometimes picture yourself in a crown?
    64. Have you ever been referred to as a child prodigy?
    65. Is your ideal relationship a power couple?
    66. Are you attracted to people who challenge you?
    67. Do you frequently dump people because they can’t keep up with you?
    68. Can you lie smoothly?
    69. Have you ever cussed someone out in such a rage that they were stunned speechless?
    70. Do your friends envy your erudite mastery of language?
    71. Are you your own worst critic?
    72. Do you thrive under pressure?
    73. Does the idea of second place enrage you?
    74. Do people follow you because they fear you?
    75. Do people follow you because they love you?
    76. Can you always see the big picture?
    77. Do you know where you can make the biggest difference?
    78. Do you hold grudges forever?
    79. Do you sleep with one eye open aka are you ever vigilant?
    80. Do you despise when people pity you?
    81. Are you proud of who you are?
    82. Are you proud of where you came from?
    83. Even if the past paints an ugly picture of you?
    84. Do you hate small talk?
    85. Have you mastered the art of putting in the least amount of effort for the best result/grade/outcome?
    86. Do you hate being a sloppy drunk?
    87. Do you hate crying in front of people?
    88. Can you count the number people you actually trust to see you cry on one hand?
    89. Have you ever made someone else cry and felt that they deserved it?
    90. Have you ever corrected a teacher in front of a class?
    91. Are constantly looking for the next best thing?
    92. Are you okay being alone?
    93. Do you always have a loophole ready?
    94. Have you ever cut someone out of your life completely?
    95. Do you believe in yourself?
    96. Do you dream bigger than pretty much everybody else around you?
    97. Do you know that you’re going to make it?
    98. Do you relish fighting your way up from the bottom?
    99. Would you ask the Sorting Hat to put you in Slytherin?

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