1. The passive aggressive roommate note.
Because confronting each other in person is unheard of.
2. The dreaded call from Sallie Mae.
Um sorry... wrong number.
3. What you consider a "full fridge."
We have ketchup and BBQ sauce, what else do we need?
4. And your freezer.
Because I only eat food that is edible after spending a mere three minutes in the microwave.
5. Your newsfeed every day.
I'M SINGLE. I GET IT, OK?
6. Your mom getting used to an empty nest.
I miss you too, Mom.
7. Clipping coupons.
And realizing it's not something only your grandma does, but something you do when you're broke as fuck.
8. Getting 84 texts a day in your group message with your college friends.
"I'll see you guys in 25 short weeks!!!!" *cries softly*
9. This awesome bank statement.
Probably after a night at the bar.
10. Your office "with a view."
This is how I die.
11. Your body rejecting alcohol.
My body is finally recognizing that THIS STUFF IS POSION.
12. Your diploma collecting dust on the floor of your closet.
*If you even remember where your diploma is.
13. One glass of wine.
If half of the bottle isn't empty after one glass, you're doing it wrong.
14. Emails for college events YEARS after graduating.
Or emails to remind you how much fun people in college are having.
15. Making yourself dinner.
Mmm... I'm so full...
16. Your ~fancy~ plates.
These are my dinner party/don't want to do dishes, plates.
17. Texts to your friends to get through the work day.
Or Snapchats taken from your lap.
18. Your go-to furniture spot.
And sometimes your lunch spot. Those Swedish meatballs, though.
19. Plants in your house.
This is why I don't have pets.
20. Running out of cups.
It was either this or drinking out of a frying pan.
21. Your idea of splurging on wine.
Anything that's not in a box is a splurge.