22 Habits That Will Never Get You Laid

Sometimes a person’s worst c***block is themselves.

1. Over-excessive winking.

When it comes to seduction, sometimes less is more.

2. Or the less commonly used, wink-point combo.

Let’s call it the “Costanza Special.”

3. Coming on a little too strong.

There’s a fine line between eagerness and desperation.

4. Or not strong enough.


5. Dropping the L word too soon.

We’ve all been there.

6. Because sometimes honesty ISN’T always the best policy.

7. In fact, the less your date knows, the better.

It’s smarter to save those deep, dark secrets until after the honeymoon.

8. Developing “The Janice” laugh.

9. Or the creepy Masuka giggle.

Instant mood killer.

10. Ugly crying.

11. Just please. Don’t.

12. But if you must cry, at least own up to it.

Temper tantrums only make things worse.

13. Menstrual talk of any kind.

Note: using similes doesn’t make the process any cuter.

14. In fact, oversharing can be extremely dangerous at any age.

Some things are just better left unsaid.

15. Baby talk.

Do I really need to explain this one?

16. Talking to inanimate objects.

Sorry, Wilson.

17. Or even just to yourself.

We all do it, but save that shit for when you’re alone.

18. THIS:

Being the worst person ever will definitely take a toll on your sex life.

19. Getting a little too caught up with your inner-geek.

Role playing can be sexy. This is not.

20. The Carlton dance.

The dancing. The sweater. I’m afraid it’s going to be one long, lonely winter, my friend.

21. Everything in this picture.


22. And, of course, any emission of foul odors.

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