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Would You Rather: Academia Edition

If you had to choose one, would you rather give up caffeine or alcohol while writing your thesis?

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  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have a paper rejected by a journal without the chance to revise and resubmit.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have a paper accepted with no changes required, but the journal takes FIVE YEARS to actually publish it.
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Would you rather...
  1.  
    vote votes
    Have a paper rejected by a journal without the chance to revise and resubmit.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Have a paper accepted with no changes required, but the journal takes FIVE YEARS to actually publish it.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not know who your examiners are before your PhD viva.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not be able to look at your thesis in the month before your PhD viva.
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  1.  
    vote votes
    Not know who your examiners are before your PhD viva.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Not be able to look at your thesis in the month before your PhD viva.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not be able to drink coffee while getting some important writing done.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not be able to drink wine while getting some important writing done.
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  1.  
    vote votes
    Not be able to drink coffee while getting some important writing done.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Not be able to drink wine while getting some important writing done.
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  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Be listed as an author on a paper whose central thesis you disagree with.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not be listed as an author on a paper that includes work you did.
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Would you rather...
  1.  
    vote votes
    Be listed as an author on a paper whose central thesis you disagree with.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Not be listed as an author on a paper that includes work you did.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have your snide comment about someone else's work accidentally get left in the published version of one of your papers.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have someone else make a snide comment about your work in their published paper.
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  1.  
    vote votes
    Have your snide comment about someone else's work accidentally get left in the published version of one of your papers.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Have someone else make a snide comment about your work in their published paper.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Not ever be able to find your PhD supervisor when you need to speak to them.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have your PhD supervisor always hovering over your shoulder while you try to work.
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Would you rather...
  1.  
    vote votes
    Not ever be able to find your PhD supervisor when you need to speak to them.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Have your PhD supervisor always hovering over your shoulder while you try to work.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have Reviewer 3 follow you around for a month critiquing literally everything you do.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have a student you are tutoring follow you around for a month asking questions they could easily find the answers to themselves.
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  1.  
    vote votes
    Have Reviewer 3 follow you around for a month critiquing literally everything you do.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Have a student you are tutoring follow you around for a month asking questions they could easily find the answers to themselves.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Go to a really boring conference, but it's in Hawaii.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Go to a really fascinating conference, but it's in Hull.
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Would you rather...
  1.  
    vote votes
    Go to a really boring conference, but it's in Hawaii.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Go to a really fascinating conference, but it's in Hull.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have to explain that you're "not THAT kind of doctor" every day for the rest of your life.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Have to explain the minutiae of your PhD topic every day for the rest of your life.
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  1.  
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    Have to explain that you're "not THAT kind of doctor" every day for the rest of your life.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Have to explain the minutiae of your PhD topic every day for the rest of your life.
  1. Would you rather...

    Would you rather...
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Always be able to hear a tiny voice whispering "you should be writing", wherever you go, but nobody else can hear it.
    Correct
    Incorrect
    Get writer's block every single time you actually try to write.
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Would you rather...
  1.  
    vote votes
    Always be able to hear a tiny voice whispering "you should be writing", wherever you go, but nobody else can hear it.
  2.  
    vote votes
    Get writer's block every single time you actually try to write.

Kelly Oakes is science editor for BuzzFeed and is based in London.

Contact Kelly Oakes at kelly.oakes@buzzfeed.com.

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