We will never want to make weekend plans that start before 2pm.
You may think we're wasting time sleeping in, but honestly the alternative is much, much worse.
We may look awake first thing in the morning, but our brain is still catching up.
So if we're rude/mean/dismissive when you talk to us, know that we don't mean it.
It's just that the first thing our brains do each morning is run through everything bad that could ever happen to us and our loved ones.
So if you have anything important to tell us, save it until the afternoon.
Or at least after we've had coffee and started to become fully functioning human beings again.
We probably have to set a million alarms to make sure we get up each morning.
And reminding us that you just naturally wake up early enough anyway is not going to change that.
We have a love/hate relationship with our snooze button.
"Getting ready" for us mostly consists of summoning up the energy to get out of bed.
If we actually get up and make breakfast for you, it means we really like you.
We reach our peak alertness just as everyone else is winding down.
Which can lead to a vicious cycle of being tired in the day and super awake in the dead of night.
We'll probably be the last ones standing at parties and nights out.
If we have a job that requires us to be up and about early, it's probably best to give us a wide berth on weekday mornings.
Ideally, after you've handed us a cup of tea or coffee to slowly sip as we think our terrible morning thoughts.
You might be tempted to offer us tips on how we could be more awake/motivated/happy in the mornings. Resist this urge.
At some point, you will hear our well-rehearsed speech about how society is set up against people like us.
But you should know that we don't actually hate morning people.
And please just bear with us while we try to get through life, one morning at a time.