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19 Things You'll Get If You've Been Through Peer Review

"The caffeine molecule is responsible for all that is good in this manuscript."

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1. When reviewers just can't agree on anything.

Reviews... Me: Here is a faster horse R1: You should have used my donkey R2: This is not a horse, it's a mule R3: I want a unicorn!

2. Ever.

3 reviewers walk into a bar. #1 took a few shots then lost interest, #3 couldn't decide on a draft, #2 set the bar on fire to watch it burn.

3. When you submit a paper and it doesn't feel as monumental as you hoped.

4. When you're sick of jumping through bureaucratic hurdles.

Cover letters are essential. Sort of. Or probably not.

5. When something goes horribly wrong.

Take your publishing sob stories and tell them to the first author of this paper

6. When you feel like giving up, but you persevere.

If at first you don't succeed, try submitting to a different journal.

7. When reviewer #3 admits what you knew all along.

8. But you know they wouldn't have the guts to say it to your face.

Reviewer 3 hiding behind the editor and waiting for the right moment to deliver his killing review.

9. When the words just won't come.

Here's the definitive research on writer's block. @raulpacheco #PublishOrPerish

10. When you decide to be completely honest about what influenced your paper.

11. And why certain things might be lacking from your work.

12. And then something extremely rare happens: a reviewer is a bit too honest about their own methods.

13. When revisions start feeling a little petty.

Instagram: @catsofacademia

14. When you realise you'll never live up to this author affiliation so you might as well give up.

That author affiliation will never be topped. h/t @Neuteufel

15. When you've had enough.

Instagram: @c

16. When you're reviewing someone else's paper and the methods section is a little sparse.

What the methods section of many papers look like @DesignUXUI #overlyhonestmethods

17. When you can't get out of the peer review mindset.

18. When you accidentally leave something in a paper draft that shouldn't be there. 😬

#overlyhonestmethods HOW did this get through? HOW? (from @davidjayharris)

19. When peer review parallels life.

Deep down, academics want the same thing as everyone else: acceptance, with minor revisions.