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    Dec 14, 2017

    23 Christmas Tweets That Are Just Fuckin' Good

    Merry Tweetmas.

    1.

    Just so we’re clear, The Grinch never really hated Christmas. He hated people, which is fair.

    2.

    3.

    he's making a list and checking it twice and i'm falling asleep and she's calling a cab

    4.

    *Flicks cigarette after a long drag* Here's the thing. If Santa knows when kids are naughty or nice then he knew Rudolph was being bullied

    5.

    My 6yo Santa skeptic was told to write a letter to Santa at school. So he did...

    6.

    WARNING TO THOSE ATTEMPTING TO KILL SANTA IN ORDER TO BECOME HIM: use your fists/a rear naked choke. if u shoot him, the GUN becomes santa

    7.

    ITS DECEMBER, YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

    8.

    I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus underneath the mistletoe last night. The moon was full and they were standing naked… https://t.co/d8dTMA8ZQ4

    9.

    They used to laugh and call him names. USED to.

    10.

    Here comes Dracula Here comes Dracula Right down...SANTA CLAUS LANE??!!

    11.

    12.

    Childhood: I WANT IT TO BE CHRISTMAS EVERY DAY. Adulthood: It's December 8th. The Christmas music is relentless. I will confess to anything.

    13.

    If anyone is Christmas shopping for me I wear a size 7 grams in weed

    14.

    A Christmas Carol is the heartwarming tale of how rich people must be supernaturally terrorized into sharing.

    15.

    Santa: “Rudolph with your nose so bright, won’t you guide my sleigh tonight?” Rudolph after being treated like shit… https://t.co/tkhCImz15j

    16.

    MALE REINDEER LOSE THEIR ANTLERS IN WINTER AND FEMALES DON'T THEREFORE SANTA'S SLEIGH IS ACTUALLY PULLED BY A TEAM… https://t.co/7rk0uk0s2Z

    17.

    michael bublé is defrosting as we speak

    18.

    Up on the rooftop, click click click / Click click click click click click click click click click click click cli… https://t.co/H1XmdtrGYs

    19.

    Couldn't choose between a star or an angel so I went with both

    20.

    Decorating our Christmas tree and daughter said, "I bet the only thing The Grinch puts on his tree is the skin of his victims."

    21.

    Give the gift that keeps on giving. Stay inside.

    22.

    Used to piss me off seeing Xmas stuff in shops in Sept, now just admire their blind optimism that we'll still be around in three months time

    23.

    you better watch out 🎅 you better watch out 🎅 you better watch out 🎅 you better watch out 🎅 you bETTER WATCH OUT 🎅… https://t.co/zqVyytjeGo

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