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    28 Products That Are Guaranteed To Get You Voted "Class Clown"

    Warning: Do not read this post in a setting where laughing out loud would be inappropriate.

    We hope you love the products we recommend! All of them were independently selected by our editors. Just so you know, BuzzFeed may collect a share of sales or other compensation from the links on this page if you decide to shop from them. Oh, and FYI — prices are accurate and items in stock as of time of publication.

    1. A truly incredible Jeff Goldblum shower curtain that'll bring you daily LOLs and, most importantly, make all your houseguests say "what the actual fuck."

    amazon.com

    Promising review: "This is literally the greatest shower curtain ever made." —Young CPA

    Get it from Amazon for $19.99.

    2. 50 Ways to Eat Cock, a book of healthy chicken recipes here to make anyone who's ever found eating cock to be gag-inducing change their tune.

    Amazon, amazon.com

    Promising review: "I bought this book for my mom, who happens to be a vegetarian. She laughed until she cried (maybe even peed a little). Then, when she began reading the recipes aloud, the whole family got in on the laugh-crying thing. She may never make a recipe from it, but listening to her say the word 'cock' repeatedly was well worth the purchase price." —MP

    Get it from Amazon for $13.46.

    3. A T-shirt depicting one of the most iconic moments in film history as well as your forever mood.

    Target

    Raise you hand if you can literally hear this shirt, if you would like a glass of alcohol please, if your name is Stove and you're an appliance, if you're ready to go to the restroom and not rest, or if you'd be chill if I just continued reciting every line from the rest of Bridesmaids.

    Get it from Target for $12.99 (available in sizes XS-XL).

    4. Clever sandwich bags printed with realistic bugs that basically make the easiest prank (and lunch thief repellant) ever.

    They're reusable!

    Promising review: "These are so fun and funny! Some are flies and some are roaches. They are AMAZINGLY realistic — I obviously know they're just pictures but they still startle me sometimes. I bought some for my sister to use when she takes her lunch to work. Someone kept eating her food out of the shared refrigerator and this stopped them...for a while at least. Also makes a fun gag gift." —Jack

    Get a pack of 24 from Amazon for $9.40.

    5. A personalized penis mug emblazoned with your name spelled out in dicks that's sure to make you feel ~cocky~. Pro tip: Don't use it in pube-lic unless you're feeling ballsy.

    MugsBerry/Etsy

    It's printed on both sides, so you won't get ~shafted~ no matter which side you hold it on! And it's microwave- and dishwasher-safe, because safety is sexy.

    Get it from MugsBerry on Etsy for $12.95+ (available in two sizes and two skin tones).

    6. Does It Fart?: The Definitive Field Guide to Animal Flatulence, because knowing which animals are capable of passing gas is guaranteed to make you a hit at every party. Not to ~toot~ your own horn, but you are hilarious, after all.

    Amazon

    Promising review: "This was a gift for my 45-year-old son! Yes, they never leave the fart phase. ;) But this book is actually filled with very interesting info — there's lots of science written in an entertaining fashion, and the simple illustrations fit perfectly. I'll admit that I read it before giving it to my son. He will now be the most popular teacher on his high school campus because hey, who else knows that sloths don't fart? LOL! If you're looking for something different for a gift, consider this. I think I'm going to order another one!" —Maryann Watkins

    Get it from Amazon for $8.78+.

    7. A box of milk chocolate anuses that are a ~a-hole~ lot of fun.

    Amazon

    Get a box of six from Amazon for $9.69.

    8. A goofy nose-shaped pencil sharpener, because sharp writing utensils are a key tool in your mission for the sweet smell of success.

    Amazon

    Get it from Amazon for $2.68.

    9. A "text message to Obama" enamel pin that made me LOL, but in, like, a laughing through the tears kind of way.

    WashiAndKawaii

    Notice the phone battery is at 44%! 😭

    Get it from WashiAndKawaii on Etsy for $6.01.

    10. A pawsitively OMG-worthy UPS pet costume sure to ~deliver~ pure joy (and about a gazillion likes on Insta).

    amazon.com, amazon.com

    It comes with a hat and a shirt with little plush arms holding a box!

    Promising review: "My dog LOVES our UPS guy so I got this costume to get a picture of them together. It's quick to get on and off. I posted some pics on Facebook and received so many compliments." —LoriLou

    Get it from Amazon for $10+ (available in sizes XS-L).

    11. A roomy tote that seems to be just a cute floral bag at first, but upon closer inspection reveals itself to be a literal bag of dicks.

    Human

    Get it from Human for $24.99+ (available in two sizes).

    12. Or, if your sense of humor is a little cheesier, a puntastic tote that'll even make folks who are lactose intolerant giggle.

    MilkandCookies/Etsy

    Get it from MilkandCookies on Etsy for $21.98.

    13. A majestic 12-month calendar with a pooping pooch for every month that's sure to make your 2019 infinitely better, no shit.

    Amazon

    There's an infamous story in my family of my aunt and uncle riding in the car with my grandpa as kids when my grandpa suddenly slammed on the brakes, pointed out the window, and said, "Look kids, that dog's taking a crap!!!!" If that's the kind of energy you want in your space (and why wouldn't you), this calendar is for you.

    Get it from Amazon for $16.99.

    14. An adorable dumbbell-shaped rattle to help you finally convince your friends and family of what you've been saying all along — that your baby is infinitely superior to all other babies.

    Amazon

    It's made of a baby-safe, BPA-free material (and no, it's not actually heavy!!!).

    Promising review: "If you're looking to pump your baby up and get them toned for the summer, this is the product for you. No more getting bullied in the sandbox and no more stolen toys." —Amber

    Get it from Amazon for $8.09 (also available in a guitar shape).

    15. A sweary oven mitt perfect for anyone who always ~handles~ everything with humor.

    Amazon

    Get it from Amazon for $12.99 (available in 19 designs).

    16. A cheeky enamel pin set that's not suggestive at all — get your mind out of the gutter! It's just some fruit and some water drops, what are you talking about???

    amazon.com

    Get a set of three from Amazon for $14.99 (or each pin is also available separately for $8.99).

    17. A wonderfully thicc corgi tush mouse pad, which'll actually provide wrist support that's no joke, no butts about it.

    Amazon

    Promising review: "This is the best ass I have EVER seen. Firm, yet squishy. Soft, yet supportive. Excellent wrist support. Best I've ever had. And not to mention, it is so frickin' cute. As if it wasn't already fantastic, the cute little corgi has just enough detail to make it even more spectacular. The tiny little tail —amazing. The big corgi ears — iconic. This corgi is the best corgi I have ever owned. The material of the mouse pad is very soft and works very well. There were absolutely no issues with my mouse at all. The bottom of the mouse pad is also great for keeping it still no matter how much you move. 15/10." —Benny Wyatt McCann

    Get it from Amazon for $11.99+ (available in two colors).

    18. A collection of adhesive bandages, each emblazoned with a different insult from one of Shakespeare's works to ensure you'll never be bard again.

    Amazon

    Get a box of 15 (with a bonus prize inside) from Amazon for $6.47.

    19. A Li'l Sebastian scented candle with notes of Scotch pine that'll transport you straight to Pawnee.

    CandECraftCo/Etsy

    Get it from CandECraftCo on Etsy for $12.

    20. A clitoral suction vibrator that is, for whatever reason, shaped like a thicc chicken (or thiccken, if you will). Just take off his little head and he's ready to give YOU head.

    Emojibator

    Because don't you want to be funny everywhere, even in bed?

    It's got eight vibration settings and eight suction settings, plus it's waterproof and USB rechargeable!

    Get it from Emojibator or Urban Outfitters for $89.

    21. A totally ~possum~ hoodie that's making me laugh way more than it should.

    Human

    This design is also available on a pullover sweatshirt, baseball tee, crewneck tee, V-neck tee, tank top, racerback tank, or baby onesie.

    Get it from Human for $39.99+ (available in sizes XS-3X, in eight colors, and as a pullover or zip hoodie).

    22. An honest doormat so your guests walk in the door knowing exactly what level of sass (and introversion) to expect.

    BoldBearFarmhouse, perfectdoormats/Etsy

    Get the "please leave by 9" mat from BoldBearFarmhouse on Etsy for $39.99 and the "I hope you told me" doormat from perfectdoormats on Etsy for $28.80+ (available in three sizes).

    23. A Michael Scott quote pillowcase to bring a whole new level of sophistication to your home (or heck, office).

    Amazon

    Get it from Amazon for $8.99.

    24. Giant adhesive googly eyes that'll always make you feel seen (literally).

    amazon.com, amazon.com

    Promising review: "These are awesome! I bought them along with a giant mustache to decorate an unsightly file cabinet that was placed in front of my desk at the office. They make everyone smile when they walk by, and they also serve as an early warning for earthquakes. It was a little tricky to remove the backing to stick them on the cabinet, but once I got it started they were easy to apply and have stayed on with no issues." —S. Freeman

    Get them from Amazon for $9.99.

    25. An adorable tee for anyone who has ever wondered why astrology nerds spend so much time talking about the phases of the moon, when they should be talking about the phases of the mew-n.

    ModCloth

    Get it from ModCloth for $24.99 (originally $29, available in sizes XS-XXL).

    26. A pair of "deal with it" sunglasses that'll become a staple in every meme lord's wardrobe.

    Amazon, amazon.com

    Promising review: "These were an impulse buy and I have not regretted it one bit! The price is great and the quality is very good for the price! They totally look just like the meme does. The white pixels on the front are definitely noticeable, but the placement of them doesn't really get in the way. I love them." —Addy Vance

    Get them from Amazon for $14.99.

    27. An aww-worthy and punny pillow sure to make everyone who sees it ~howl~ with laughter.

    Forever 21

    Get it from Forever 21 for $12.90.

    28. A llovely and llol-worthy llama stapler and tape dispenser, because even your desk supplies should make you (and others) smile.

    ModCloth

    Get the stapler for $10 and the tape dispenser for $17, both from ModCloth.

    You IRL:

    PBS

    The reviews used in this post have been edited for length and clarity.

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