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Things That You Learn From Job Hunting

Because you are just so un-employable

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1) No one wants to hire you

2) You will literally hear back from no one, not even to be rejected

3) You'll try interning for free and slowly watch your soul die away

4) You'll master the art of exaggeration on your cover letter


I am highly motivated individual who is eager to thrive... says the person sat on their laptop at 2pm un-showered and still in their pyjamas

5) You will accept your fate as a professional sloth


Perhaps you can make money from that?

6) Buzzfeed will become your best friend


1 job application completed, two hours on Buzzfeed as my reward

7) You'll apply for a job at Buzzfeed

8) They won't hire you...

9) You'll begin to question your own abilities


Maybe I really am no good at anything?

10) You'll eat to numb the pain

11) You'll cry over your weight gain

12) You'll plan numerous interview outfits in the hope that you'll eventually get to wear one

13) You finally land an interview!

14) Only to realise that you're outfit looks crap

15) But hey, maybe you're finally about to be employed?

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