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    Dec 24, 2012

    The Truth Befind Santa's Wild Booze And Sex-Filled Night

    For the first time ever, Santa's actual trip is captured in photographs.

    On Christmas Eve, Santa says goodbye to his favorite polar bear and leaves out some extra fish for the night

    Lionel Cironneau / AP

    In his sleigh, he makes his first stop in Finland

    Lehtikuva / Reuters

    But in his next stop in Russia, Santa has a few too many vodkas...

    Ilya Naymushin / Reuters

    He wakes up at 5am next to a strange girl. Oh shit, he's running late

    Lionel Cironneau / AP

    His reindeer all left without him, so he catches a boat

    Eliseo Fernandez / Reuters

    When he gets to land, he hotwires a motorcycle

    Justin Sullivan / Getty Images

    Then he steals an elephant...

    Chaiwat Subprasom / Reuters

    Dammit, when he gets to Rio de Janeiro, he's spotted by some kids

    Silvia Izquierdo / AP

    He's gotta SCUBA across the Atlantic Ocean

    Sukree Sukplang / Reuters

    Oooh awkward... he runs into an old mermaid flame.

    Romeo Ranoco / Reuters

    Santa's kind of a neatfreak, so in Tokyo, he stops to clean the windows on a building he stops at

    Kim Kyung-Hoon / Reuters

    He drops by Afghanistan to say hi to a few friends

    Fabrizio Bensch / Reuters

    Ugh hungover as heck and having to cycle across the Sahara

    Max Rossi / Reuters

    Ok quick break to say hi to Katy Perry. Hey girl, how you doin'?

    Astrid Stawiarz / Getty Images

    Finally, he buys a last minute commercial ticket home

    The Arizona Republic, Tom Tingle / AP

    C'mon c'mon dude, don't you know how this is?

    Win McNamee / Getty Images

    Skiing back to the North Pole

    Stefano Rellandini / Reuters

    And finally, back with his polar bear friend. What a night!

    Lionel Cironneau / AP

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