The 33 Most Swedeny Things That Ever Happened In Sweden

Shmergen shmörgen shpergen! Yah?

1. The subway ran local to this stop:

2. Balloons were absolutely forbidden from this train station:

3. The intricate legal system was explained:

4. Cool Ranch Doritos were given a more appropriate name:

5. Taking out the trash was the most dangerous task one could perform:

6. A highly dangerous prison break occurred:

7. Every child loved their meatballs and would stack them in piles with glee:

8. The Swedish bikini team was revealed to be a LIE and life was horrible.

Old Milwaukee beer ads, how could you have lied to us like this? We trusted you!

9. A better version of Manhattan existed:

10. Everyone saw these road signs and didn’t laugh:

11. This tragedy occurred:

12. Delicious food was eaten:

13. And everything was served in a weird tube:

14. H&M gave a very sensible warning on its clothing:

15. Totally normal pet care products were sold:

16. And no one snickered at the cat food names:

17. The most truly Swedish vodka was consumed:

18. Swedish Fish were just called:

19. Tons and tons of salty black licorice was consumed voluntarily and without gagging:

20. Batman was called Läderlappen and that was just fine with everyone:

21. Seriously, what did we say about the balloon?! NO GODDAMN BALLOONS!

22. An entire museum dedicated to national heroes, ABBA, was opened:

23. A police officer went above and beyond to make sure parking ticket justice was served:

24. The king unleashed a sonic assault on the woman sitting in front of him:

25. The playground was full of only dads:

26. Everyone shopped for cool clubwear at this store:

27. Everyone listened to the Metal-Aid supergroup charity song:

Seriously. The song is called “Give a Helping Hand” and it’s amazing.

28. This guy won the hearts of all Swedes when he was voted runner up in the Melodifestivalen:

His name is Yohio, and he’s perfect in every way.

29. This happened:

30. Moose exhibited the progressive sexual values of their home country:

31. And this moose was too drunk to drive home:

32. This happened all day, every day:

33. And all were forced to DEAL WITH IT when the king was caught smoking:

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