1. In school and at work, you'll never get to be THE Katie.
2. You'll (ALMOST) never be short on souvenir swag.
You're so used to seeing your name included among the keychains and license plates that it feels like a PERSONAL ATTACK when, all of a sudden, you scroll right from "Kate" to "Kathy" to "Karen" and DON'T see a Katie.
3. Somehow, you get asked ALL THE TIME: "Katie — is that short for something?"
4. Your name isn't recognized for the extensive, mysterious full names it's possibly short for.
5. But the only person who calls you by the full version of your name is your dentist.
6. On the first day of school you always had to be like, "ACTUALLY, I go by Katie."
7. And once you've asked to go by Katie, there's always someone who tries to be like "Oh, Katherine/Kathleen is so much prettier, though."
8. Most of your friends' dads call you "Kate."
9. You have an instinctive, reflexive distrust of your dastardly cousin — the Katy.
10. And ever since THIS ONE showed up, people seem to think "Katy" is the default spelling. BUT IT'S NOT.
11. And there's always that one girl whose hippie parents just HAD to spell it all *uniquely.*
12. Katies are rudely stereotyped as the vaguely complimentary but mostly boring "girl next door."
13. On the plus side, Katies are literally always so beautiful you could practically die looking at them.
14. Sometimes people accuse Katies of being a little bossy and/or crazy.
How is it possible to be the bossy, crazy, best friend's sister next door? It's TOO MUCH PRESSURE.