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    22 Facts You'll Only Get Your Head Around After You Leave Essex

    Where are the tanning salons? Where?

    1. You never feel comfort like you do when you see the "Welcome to Essex" sign.

    2. You can't say more than a few words without people guessing where you're from.


    "Yeah, so I work in Fi–"

    "OMG. You're from Essex, aren't you?"

    3. And then they'll try to do an impression, and it'll be awful.


    It always is.

    4. At some point, you'll realise that not everyone has done the ~horseriding thing~.

    Via Flickr: cosmicherb70

    Outside of Essex, kids did other activities on a Saturday.

    5. Whenever you meet anyone else from Essex, you instantly have an unreal bond.



    6. But everyone else will keep asking you what it was liking growing up in London.


    "I'm actually from Essex."

    "Oh. Is everyone really orange there?"


    7. You feel sad for people who never got to experience Southend Pier in the summertime.

    8. You'll never find a shopping centre that compares to Lakeside.

    Via / Creative Commons

    "I mean, it's alright, but it's not Lakeside, is it?"

    9. But you will learn that even though Braintree Freeport is a bit crap, outlet shopping centres can be pretty decent.


    It's just a shame us Essex folk have all been tainted with rubbish old Braintree Freeport.

    10. When you go home, all of your friends and family tell you that "you talk different now".


    "You pronounce your t's now! You sound so posh!"

    11. All the rest of the UK knows about Essex is what they learnt from TOWIE.

    12. There'll come a day when you realise how much prettier landscapes are when they have hills in them.

    Via Flickr: cathedraljack

    Seriously, Essex is really flat.

    13. And how much better chips are when they're covered in cheese and gravy.

    14. People eat jam that isn't from the Tiptree Jam Factory.

    15. And don't even get us started on salt that isn't from Maldon.

    16. Personalised number plates are very much not the norm outside of Essex.

    17. Neither is getting pissed with your mate's mum at Christmas.

    ITV / Via

    Apparently not all mums do that – who knew?

    18. You can't help but notice people don't make an effort on nights out like they do at home.


    You've genuinely met people who go on a night out without makeup and wearing a pair of boyfriend-fit jeans.

    19. Chanting "Essex! Essex!" outside a nightclub doesn't quite have the same reaction when you're not, you know, in Essex.


    In fact, in some places, it'll make you get your head kicked in.

    20. The rest of the country is in dire need of a few more tanning salons.

    Google Maps


    21. Essex is seriously frigging expensive.

    E! / Via

    It's like almost London, I shit you not. Everywhere else is cheaper than Essex and it's glorious.

    22. And you'll always get fiercely protective when people tell you that Essex is shit.


    Because really, there's no place like home.

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