You have an insane amount of kitchenware.
Ffs stop calling me mum.
"Essex! Essex! Essex!"
"Essex just isn't what it used to be."
When you ask to speak to our manager, we pass you over to our mate.
Where are the tanning salons? Where?
We hate washing your hair.
Mushroom and courgette fajita anyone?
We bribe your kids. Sorry.
Takeaways, pet names, and genes like David Gandy.
Do you say "water" or "waw-ah"?
The "Can I Just Have A Pint Though?" face.
Oh no, spent half my budget for today on bath bombs.
Didn't I see that waistcoat in a Zoella haul video?
WHERE ARE THE BAKED BEANS?
For starters, you can forget shopping on a Sunday.
Were your best trackie bottoms Adidas or Reebok?
Because it's a lot more than just burger vans. Although admittedly they are probably up there.