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17 Resolutions Canadians Can't Keep For The New Year

"I will not go over my data limit on my phone."

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1. I will shovel the driveway before it snows too much.

Via romainlaurent.tumblr.com

But if I wait until the snow stops, then I only have to shovel once. So what if it's more difficult and takes way longer?

2. I will stop saying "sorry" so much.

The CW / Via giphy.com

Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to say "sorry." Sorry about that. Sorry.

3. I will stop rolling my eyes when Americans complain about how cold it is.

But they keep whining when it's only -20 (-32 with the wind chill)!
Via imgur.com

But they keep whining when it's only -20 (-32 with the wind chill)!

4. I will stop pointing out when a celebrity is Canadian.

If I don't tell them, how will they know?!
Kat Angus / BuzzFeed Canada

If I don't tell them, how will they know?!

5. When summer arrives, I will remember how miserable winter was and I won't complain about the heat.

Disney / Via giphy.com

But it's so hot and sweaty and everything is terrible!

6. I will stop making fun of Winnipeg.

Interscope / Via youtube.com

But... It's Winnipeg.

7. I will not let my GoodLife membership go to waste.

Disney Pixar

I'll go tomorrow. Really, I will.

8. I will stop objectifying Justin Trudeau.

Via machinyan.tumblr.com

This is just an exercise in futility.

9. I will stop taking Degrassi so personally.

Bell Media / Via youtube.com

But they keep killing off characters I love!

10. I will stop getting mad at Tim Hortons employees.

Give me my damned double-double and bagel B.E.L.T. or there will be problems.
Via Twitter: @leah_koz

Give me my damned double-double and bagel B.E.L.T. or there will be problems.

11. I will accept that one serving of Kraft Dinner is only one-quarter of a box.

Via brideofblacula.tumblr.com

What is this, a serving for ants?

12. I will not go over my data limit on my phone.

Via huffingtonpost.ca

LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE.

13. I will finally learn to speak French fluently.

Nine years of French class and still nothing.
NBC / Via tumblr.com

Nine years of French class and still nothing.

14. I will stop snacking on the candy while shopping at Bulk Barn.

But sampling is still allowed, right?
BuzzFeed Canada

But sampling is still allowed, right?

15. I will stop singing "Hotline Bling" at work.

Cash Money / Republic / Via youtube.com

Please. I'll stop when everyone else stops.

16. I will accept that Ryan and Rachel aren't getting back together.

MTV / Via youtube.com

I still maintain that they're just in denial.

17. And finally, I will stop getting emotionally involved in Canadian sports teams.

MLB / Via deadspin.com

I know it's a one-way ticket to heartbreak, but I just can't help myself.