1.It's sad but true: You've never known how to act around children.
2.When you attempt to comfort them, you end up making them feel worse.
3.And when you do try to engage with them, you end up making a complete fool of yourself.
4.Trying to figure out a kid's age is both agonizing and algebra.
5.You've heard of maternal and paternal instinct, but you personally have never really felt it.
6.It's not that you dislike kids. You just like them from afar. Very, very afar.
7.When you get roped into babysitting, it just makes you wonder why people sign up for 18 years of it.
8.But let's be honest: You avoid babysitting at all costs.
9.Some people are good with kids and some aren't, and you're OK with being part of the second group. You have other skills, like taking the perfect nap, or timing your pizza order to arrive the second you're home from work.