10 Tips From Bollywood That Will Vastly Improve Your Sex Life
Warning: Totally Safe For Work.
India has always been a pioneer when it comes to sex. The Kama Sutra and our ancient temple carvings are evidence to our longstanding belief in taking risks when it comes to doin' the dirty.
Liji Jinaraj / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: karmadude
Today, that role has been taken on by Bollywood, an industry that has risen gloriously to the challenge of keeping us all satisfied. Here are the greatest sex lessons we can learn from Bollywood:
Red Chillies Entertainment / Karima Khan
Tip 1: Make lusty sustained eye contact to establish the sexually telepathic connection.
Ultra / Via bollypop.in
Make sure to do lots of that. Enough is not enough.
Vishesh Films / Via Karima Khan
Tip 2: Embrace the great outdoors. Nothing's more sensual than dancing around trees, everyone knows that.
Shemaroo / Karima Khan
Forests, beaches, all manner of wilderness – these marvels of nature were created in order for us to do erotic dance moves in.
United Seven Creations / Karima Khan
Bollywood's subliminal message is to love the environment. So do it all outdoor even if PDA is a punishable offence here.
Venus Movies / Via Karima Khan
Oysters? Wine? Nah. The greatest aphrodisiac is an outdoor disco-sesh.
YRF / Karima Khan
Tip 3: Make your intentions known by violently shaking a flower. If your partner does the same, IT'S ON.
Dharma Productions / Karima Khan
Tip 4: Rain has been embraced by Bollywood as a symbol of wetness, and for good reason. Enjoy the monsoon – the easiest way to come again another day.
Shree Ashtavinayak Cine Vision / Karima Khan
Use months June to September to full advantage.
YRF / Karima Khan
And, a gentle reminder: don't forget to include erotic dancing.
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Tip 5: Run towards your lover, get that heart rate going.
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Running is the most effective foreplay, as demonstrated by hundreds of Bollywood movies.
Venus Movies / Karima Khan
Tip 6: If the running gets tiring, try rolling. Roll sensually into their arms.
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Here Bollywood teaches us to combine sexual moves: Simultaneously roll, AND embrace the outdoors. Wow.
Shemaroo / Via Karima Khan
Tip 7: Learn how to play the piano. The keys are the ultimate key to pant zip.
Divya Films International
Score in bed by mastering music scores. #Boom #ThatsRight
YRF
Tip 8: Involve milk because nothing suggests "I wanna do the deed" more than a warm glass of white fluid.
Base Industries Group / Via Karima Khan
Tip 9: Take items of jewelry off, slowly and one-by-one. Savour this painstaking process that will probably take all night.
http://J.P. Films / Karima Khan
Tip 10: The most important of all is to do it on white sheets or else you'll have bad luck for 7 years.
YRF / Karima Khan
And again: Don't leave erotic dance moves off the menu. Ever.
Ultra / Karima Khan
The more the better, tbh.
Ultra / Karima Khan
There ya go. You're officially ready for some major Bang Bang.
Fox STAR Studios / Karima Khan