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12 Burning Questions "Fuller House" Needs To Answer ASAP

For starters, whatever happened to predictability? The milkman? The paperboy? Evening TV?

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1. Did Stephanie's "bad influence friend" Gia ever get her life sorted out?

ABC

Is she vaping now? Did she hold on to all her chokers and black lace crop tops, now that they're back in style?

2. Did the Katsopolis family ever resent Michelle for emotionally manipulating Jesse into staying in the attic?

ABC

And did Becky ever confront her husband about the fact that he let a toddler con him into staying in another family's house?

3. Did Michelle develop an incredibly narcissistic personality after years of unchecked misbehavior?

4. Did Joey ever expand his repertoire of impressions beyond old cartoon characters?

ABC

Or at least update it to include newer animated gems like Stewie Griffin and Tina Belcher? Is he still relying on Rocky and Bullwinkle?

5. Is Michelle still making horrifyingly bad financial decisions?

ABC

She makes $221 in one day at a lemonade stand, and is on her way to blow it all on candy (!!) when she decides instead to spend it all in a petting zoo donkey (!!!!). Did anyone sit her down to discuss the importance of saving and investing your income?

8. What happened to Shorty the donkey?

ABC

Did the zoo really just accept a donated donkey? Why was the traveling petting zoo originally so keen to get rid of him? Did Michelle at least get a tax break for donating a live animal to the San Francisco zoo?

9. Who put the dinosaur skeleton back together?

ABC

Is the entire Tanner family still banned from the museum (as they should be)? And why wasn't the skeleton better assembled in the first place? Do paleontologists not use glue?

10. Is there a possibility that DJ is actually Uncle Joey and Aunt Becky's lovechild?

Twitter / Via Twitter: @davecoulier

No disrespect to the late Pam Katsopolis-Tanner, but the evidence is kind of undeniable? Seriously, look at these three. Maybe the Tanners adopted Becky's baby from Nebraska because she wasn't ready to be a mom. It's a long shot, but still not outside the realm of possibility for a show where a child drove a car into a kitchen. SOMEONE WRITE THE FIC.

12. And did anyone ever pay rent?

ABC

Was Danny actually footing the bill for a full grown man AND a family of four, in addition to his own three daughters? Is local news really that lucrative?

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