Everything about the internet has gotten better. Sites work and look better, information is easier to find. It’s funnier! It’s smarter! Good job, everyone.
That said, I do miss the chaos of the old days. The filth and the mess, the hours of sorting through creatively awful Geocities pages. I miss looking for information on a historical event and only being able to find other students’ cross-sourced shitty book reports, imprinted in Comic Sans over an animated GIF background. That internet was basically useless, but it felt — and still feels — like home.
Million Short takes you back there. Not specifically to the past, though it’s pretty good at doing that too, but to the bottom. By whizzing you straight past the top million search results for any given term, Million Short reconnects us with the vast unsorted, unranked, unrefined and unappreciated content swamp on top of which the modern internet was built. Here are the kinds of “top” results you get:
8. “health advice”
9. “plane tickets”
12. A vanity search for my own name
I think I may never stop using this. This is the internet where I belong.
- The Women's March on Washington was one of the largest protests in the city's history.
- Trump's spokesman held a press conference to blame grass coverings for "minimizing" the crowd at the inauguration 🤔
- Members of the national security community reacted with shock after Trump attacked his critics while giving a speech at CIA headquarters.
- "SNL" featured a shirtless Vladimir Putin celebrating America's newest President.