Buzz·Posted on Jan 15, 201416 Wedding Gifts You Will Get No Matter WhatGreat, another toaster.by Justin AbarcaBuzzFeed StaffFacebookPinterestTwitterMailLink 1. A toaster. Hyperion Pictures / Via collider.com Your old one was getting sort of crusty, (pun intended), so why not register for an upgrade? Well, because chances are you'll get multiple, and none will be the model you wanted. 2. Towels galore. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Buena Vista Pictures / Via dailydot.com Towels are a pretty safe bet because everyone showers (hopefully). However, you will be gifted enough towels for the Australian Diving Team and then some. 3. Crystal frames. Via monstermarketplace.com These will look great in your new "Boca Raton in the '80s"-themed living room you are putting together, right? 4. Gross-scented candles. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Disney / Via pichaus.com "Caribbean Breeze" smells more like "Bad Spring Break Memories." What is wrong with plain white candles, again? 5. A figurine. Via liweddings.com "I hope someone gets us a figurine of children getting married." — No couple ever. 6. Fancy glassware that you will never use unless the president comes over. Via rnrassociates.com Seriously, these are going in the cupboard wrapped in multiple pieces of tissue paper only to be forgotten until it is time to move. 7. A homemade "work of art." Via reddit.com They will never be as awesome as this, though. 8. Something religious. Via bonpourtonpoil.ch Even if you aren't religious it will happen, and you will have to display it when the person who gave it to you comes to visit. 9. One Honeyfund donation for the excursion you don't really want to do. Via girlwitharing.com Sure, the donation can go towards anything on your list, but when the person who donated sees you, you'll have to explain why you didn't go on that Horseshoeing In The Tropics excursion. 10. A kitchen gadget you didn't even know existed. Via sogoodblog.com But still sort of rad, well, for the one time you'll use it. 11. A gift with no card attached. Via scottishepilepsy.org Just think of it as one less thank you card you have to write. 12. On the other hand, a card that mentions a gift you never received. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Lifetime / Via giffyreviews.tumblr.com This is the perfect crime of not actually having to give a gift, not that you can accuse anyone of that, though. 13. An engraved/embroidered gift. Via artfire.com Just in case you forget your names. 14. Gift cards to places you never go. Via beyroutey.wordpress.com Well you will now! Hope you enjoy driving thirty miles to the nearest Macaroni Grill! 15. A perfect, beautiful, thoughtful gift with a lovely note given to you by someone you hardly know. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Fox Searchlight / Via quizzicalllama.wordpress.com Nothing like sobbing while you ask, "Which one is Emily, again?" 16. Cash. Tap to play GIF Tap to play GIF Paramount Pictures / Via cockbarf.tumblr.com People say that cash is an impersonal gift, but what cash really says is, "This is what I personally would want, so here you go."