17 Things Only People Who Love Ketchup Will Understand
Got 99 problems but the ketch ain't one.
1. Not shaking the bottle hard enough and getting ketchup water.
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Aka the gross pudding skin of condiments.
2. Forgetting to wipe the bottle, then later dealing with ketchup crust.
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Good luck getting it closed properly if you don't.
3. Defending yourself when people say only mustard should go on hot dogs.
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Oh, be quiet mustard freaks.
4. Seeing one of these at a restaurant and jumping for joy.
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All the ketchup I want? Is it my birthday?
5. The thrill of trying new and exciting varieties.
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I am green with envy right now.
6. People giving you side eye for putting ketchup on everything.
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What? It tastes great on everything.
7. Having stashes of these little guys everywhere.
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They never go bad, right?
8. The agony and ecstasy of opening a new bottle and waiting for it to come out.
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#worththewait
9. When you get a little more than you wanted.
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Not that you won't eat all of it, though.
10. Saying "yes" to ketchup at a drive thru and getting hardly any.
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Who only eats this much ketchup? Fairies?
11. When people ask if you've ever made your own.
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HAHAHAHA
12. When there is hardly any left in the bottle and it starts to fart.
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It wasn't me, it was the bottle, I swear!
13. Watching as someone who doesn't know the Heinz 57 trick struggles in frustration.
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Don't be a George Costanza.
14. You are the ambassador of teaching people this ketchup hack.
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You're welcome, world!
15. The injustice of restaurants that refuse to serve ketchup.
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I mean, it's their right to be wrong, I guess.
16. You know the difference between ketchup and catsup.
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Which is that there is no difference, save one spelling being a letter away from "catsoup."
17. Finally, you don't understand how anyone can eat fries without ketchup.
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I mean, are these people even human? I pity them.