So It Turns Out Some Men’s Beards Are Covered In The Same Bacteria That's Found In Poop
Says Albuquerque’s ABC affiliate who swabbed and tested several men's beards.
Beards. They are a wonderful thing.
They make the world go 'round.
Yes. Fantastic.
But lo, there is a problem with beards, even Jamie Dornan's: POOP.

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Albuquerque's ABC affiliate swabbed and tested several men's beards and found that while some beards contained normal bacteria, others' beards contained bacteria similar to those found in fecal matter.

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John Golobic, a microbiologist at Quest Diagnostics, tested material swabbed from the beards and found that they were basically as "dirty as toilets."

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Even, perhaps, Tom Hardy's.
Not all the beards Golobic tested contained fecal matter–like bacteria. But the ones that did, he said, were "somewhat disturbing."

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And Golobic also wants people to keep in mind that most things you touch — including your cell phone, your kitchen sponge, and your toothbrush — harbor tons of germs.
So a little beard poop is pretty par for the course.
The solution? BEARD SCRUBBING, guys. And keeping your dirty hands away from your facial hair.

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Have you broken out the hand sanitizer yet?
This post's title has been updated to more accurately reflect the findings of the study.