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wouldn't it be cool if silicon valley tried to disrupt things that are actually broken, like men
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How can I be a misogynist if I live in my MOM's basement
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Best part of Cast Away has to be when Tom Hanks spends hours on cave paintings of his true love The Grinch Who Stol… https://t.co/b9wnXhszrR
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when someone asks if you're trying a new eyeshadow but it's really just redness breakout from your debilitating ski… https://t.co/Ds7c1dCyQD
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today in Men On The Internet:
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If you don't have a husband you can't get murdered by him = life advice from Forensic Files
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What else would you ever talk about
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reading my horoscope
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Sorry, the old Scully can't come to the phone right now... #tbt
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dating someone based only on looks is so shallow. consider other things like can they unironically listen to the jonas brothers?
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"Why do you have to make this political?!" *gestures around vaguely, wearily*
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Before u leave the house, think of the acronym 'WOWEE' Wallet phOne Wkeys Egg Egg (backup)
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Ok so when Selena Gomez's friend gives her a kidney it's "true friendship" but when I toss my kidney over Brendan Fraser's gate it's "ma'am"
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time out new york "Undateables" should just be called "Single Women In NYC Are Literally Perfect, Single Men In NYC… https://t.co/DkqwEusAEf
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"SO BACK IN THE DAY, MY FRIEND HAD THIS YACHT AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIIIIIIIIEVE THE THINGS I SAW GO DOWN..."
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Wow ran into all my exes at once: