1.
You're always fighting with your friends over crop tops.
2.
And shopping bags. Of course.
3.
Choosing outfits takes place in a mysterious cloud of smoke.
4.
Women are always forgetting to use their hands to carry things.
5.
Shoes take on mythic, Renaissance-painting like importance.
7.
Can you tell we express our inner most desires through the purchasing of shoes?
8.
Even if we're a little confused about exactly how you wear them.
9.
Closets are where you hide/freakout/make a scene.
10.
Bags are for having disinterested battles.
11.
Or for jauntily holding over your head.
12.
Or for lifting over your head and staring joyfully into the heavens.
13.
You like to celebrate your big online shopping wins surrounded by your bag friends.
14.
You feel most liberated when you're carrying tons of pretty multi-colored bags.
15.
But you can't underestimate the power of online shopping, too.
16.
Or shopping in ~foreign locales~
17.
Credit card debt? What's that?
18.
Posing like mannequins? SO FUN!
19.
"WHEE! I'm a young attractive woman shopping on a white background!"
20.
People are always offering you shoes and jewels, wherever you go.
21.
Sometimes you go shopping in show girl outfits, because why not.
22.
And other times, you use your clueless husband as a couch.
23.
Whee! Shopping sure does suspend you in the time-space continuum!
