1.
How come when a house is 'haunted' its always a ghost from the 1700s? imagine a ghost from 2007 screaming "ITS BRITNEY BITCH" at 3 am.
2.
me on a bad day
3.
every 5 days american twitter is in panic because the government is voting on whether to release ebola virus into their water or something
4.
babyboomer: IT is terrifying, Pennywise haunts my dreams millennial: yas god send me down in that sewer 2 my misery. I wanna bang the clown
5.
in this horrible time, let us at least be bolstered by small miracles like finding out your ex moved to a different city
6.
7.
Just realized Gotham has no plan for signalling Batman if there's a daytime emergency.
8.
9.
All apps are dating apps if you're online enough
10.
If you call your significant other your "partner in crime" I will have u arrested
11.
i pray for death
12.
Wait. Why is it called ghosting? Ghosts stick around. THAT'S THEIR WHOLE DEAL.
13.
i can't believe i ever hated working one block off of Times Square, you can smell ANYTHING here
14.
Weird I thought she was just "walking"
15.
Sorry i'm late I sat on my bed in a towel for an hour staring at the wall
16.
just guessing but i think this box is a pisces
17.
IT and ronald mcdonald are an item and that's why mcdonalds slogan is "I'm lovin' IT" because they're clowns in love