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55 People Who Are Officially Canceled In 2018

An airing of grievances.

1. People who text during movies.

2. People who take phone calls or play on their phones during movies.

3. People who don't understand the concept of "inside voice."

4. Tall people who stand in the front row of concerts basically blocking short people from seeing anything.

5. People who insist on talking through entire concerts.

6. People who insist on holding their phone up and recording an entire concert and blocking your view, even though you KNOW they're never gonna watch that footage ever again.

7. People — usually men — who take up two seats or more on public transportation.

8. And then when they're asked to scoot over barely move as if their testicles are precious baby Jesuses that must be protected at all costs.

9. People who use selfie sticks at museums.

10. People who touch the artwork at museums.

11. The idiot who wasn't paying attention whilst taking a selfie and actually destroyed a piece of art at a museum.

12. People doing it 'for the 'Gram' and people who say they're 'doing it for the 'Gram.'

13. People who insist on talking to you when you have headphones in.

14. People who treat public spaces — like airplane seats or cafés — like their own personal couches and take their fucking shoes off or put their feet up.

15. People who watch videos or listen to music on their computers without headphones in.

16. People who sit on the aisle on a crowded train or bus, and use the inside seat for the bag, and pretend like they can't hear you when you ask to sit down.

17. People who say "EXCUSE YOU."

18. People who stop in the middle of the sidewalk — or at the end of an escalator — suddenly.

18. People who don't say 'get home safe' or some variation when you're separating after hanging out.

19. People who brush their teeth and leave toothpaste scatter from their mouth on their bathroom mirrors and don't wipe it.

20. People who don't clean out the shower drain after they take a shower.

21. People who at movies ask you what's happening when you're both watching the thing for the first time but you always know they don't know what's happening cause they weren't trying to pay attention.

22. People who keep the "camera shutter" and "typing clicks" sounds ACTIVATED on their phones.

23. People who claim to be your friend, but upload unflattering photos of you and tag you in them.

24. People who spend like 20 minutes waiting in line at a coffee shop or restaurant and then when they finally get to the front of the line dawdle and don't know what they want.

25. People who leave their iPhone text ding on full blast then get like a zillion texts during the day.

26. People who speak on speakerphone in public.

27. And often insist on holding their phones like a fucking slice of pizza.

28. People who Facetime while walking down the street.

29. People who clip their nails in public.

30. People who who refuse to take off their large backpacks on crowded subways.

31. People who have to look at their phones while walking up the stairs, slowing down everyone behind them.

32. People who don't get off the phone when they're ordering at a coffee shop or restaurant.

33. People who don't say "thank you."

34. People who don't tip.

35. People who are grown adult babies and won't clean up after themselves and leave messes for other people to take care of.

36. People who refer to their significant others as their "partner in crime" or say that they're looking for a "partner in crime" on a dating profile.

37. People on dating apps who say they're "just here to make friends."

38. People who refer to their partner as their "lover" in public.

39. People who don't wait for people to get off the subway/elevator/whatever before getting on.

40. People who sneeze into their hands or touch their genitals and then touch the subway railing.

41. People who don't replace the toilet paper roll.

42. People who drink all but the tiniest of baby drops of milk/juice/soda and then return it to the refrigerator.

43. People who comment things like "nobody cares" on articles about the Kardashians, even though they in fact clicked on the article so must, in fact, actually, care.

44. Strangers who feel inclined to offer unsolicited advice to people with children.

45. People who feel the need to physically pick up every short or tiny person they see.

46. People who try on your glasses without asking.

47. People who take food off your plate without asking.

48. People who exclusively talk about cryptocurrency.

49. People who knowingly take up two parking spaces because they can't be bothered to move their car up a little bit.

50. People who walk three-across on a busy sidewalk.

51. People involved in MLMs who are always trying to sell you stuff on Facebook.

52. Dads who only discovered that women were "people" when they had daughters.

53. People who FaceTune their kid's photos.

54. People who pet stranger's dogs without asking.

55. People who refer to themselves as "thinkfluencers."

OK, who are you canceling in 2018? Tell us in the comments!

Dump Week is a series of posts that will help you take out the trash in every aspect of your life, making room for all the good stuff you deserve. See more posts here.