We recently asked members of the BuzzFeed Community for their Valentine's Day horror stories. Here are some of their most hilarious tales...
1. The ol' switcheroo.
"My boyfriend said “I love you” for the first time on Valentine’s Day while we were having sex. Romantic? Not so much. He prefaced it with “I love [insert female best friend’s name here]”.
Turns out he wanted to soften the blow of saying those ever so important words. It softened something, alright."—abcdefgonow
2. The fake out.
"As a teen, I never got a valentine, while other girls at school would show off huge cards, teddies and chocolates. One year I had enough and wrote myself a fake card, and took it in.
But I struggle badly with lying, and in my guilt it all elaborated and elaborated until by 3pm I had been engaged, cheated on, and dumped, and was setting fire to the card on the school pathway shouting “you cheat! You cheat! It’s over!!” while I stamped all over it.
But no one cared anyway and the whole school of 700 students just trundled boredly past except for one withering ‘grow up, Jenny’." — jennyb27
3. The Harry Potter horror.
"My boyfriend planned for us to take a Harry Potter studio tour in London. The night before, he tells my friend he doesn’t think he loves me. The next morning he says he’s 'going to get breakfast' before we have to leave for the train and he never comes back. I didn’t hear from him for two days and still haven’t had a chance to go to the studio." — sarahr471fec3cf
4. The stopover.
"My long-distance internet boyfriend of several years surprised me with a visit to my college dorm on February 13. It was the first time we met in person. We spent the day kissing and cuddling until I invited him to spend the night. Then he told me that he was actually just stopping through Illinois on his way to New York, where he was moving to live with his actual girlfriend." — mmemordant
5. The carnation crisis.
"When I was in high school we used to give our classmates carnations as Valentines. I spent an entire afternoon handing these flowers out in all the different classrooms. Everyone in our school got at least one flower from a friend or a special someone—except for me. All. Four. Years. Of. High school. Not a single flower. To this day the sight and smell of carnations makes me cringe." — elkidmarie
6. The cruelest catch.
"My ex said he was busy doing stuff with his family, so I went out drinking with my single friends — and saw him in a bar I used to work at with another girl. I went in and bought a pint just to pour it all over him." — ashleighc4ed46850a
7. The pizza problem.
"Last Valentine’s Day my long distance boyfriend and I got into a fight. I decided to try and say sorry by sending him a heart-shaped pizza from Pizza Hut. I got a phone call about 30 minutes after I ordered saying that he refused my pizza. So the Pizza Hut girl called to ask what I wanted to do with it. I started crying on the phone and told her to eat my love pizza." — chelseas43d2bacba
8. The burrito blow out.
"I was at my boyfriend's house and got food poisoning from a burrito bowl. I couldn’t even drive home I was so sick. When I was laying in my own self pity and thought it couldn’t be any worse his heat crapped out. It wasn’t fixed until 8pm that night, and it was one of the coldest days of the year. I literally had to wear my winter coat in his bed covered in three blankets, all while trying to not shit my pants when I had to run to the bathroom every 20 minutes. On the up side he was very sweet about the whole situation." — saskiac4879fdf3a
9. The rose ruse.
"Received a bunch of roses and a teddy bear in the post on Valentine’s Day. No idea who they were from. The next day, my ex messaged me, 'hope you enjoyed the day thinking that someone actually likes you. They were from me'..at least the roses were expensive and pretty." — Rache Amber
10. The card cad.
"I went over to my boyfriend’s apartment, and was changing into something fun when I happened to find a Valentine’s card from another girl suggesting ‘sexy time’ and thanking him for being so perfect. I checked the date and it was the exact same day. Naturally he didn’t get to enjoy the outfit and I spent the remainder of the night alone with a bottle of wine." — kempermckenzie
11. The Nick nod.
"I was casually seeing this guy and we decided to spend Valentine’s Day together. We had a really nice evening that ended in us doing the deed.
After, he turned to me and said 'I really fancy someone.' I thought he was being coy and was referring to me, so with a smile on my face I said 'oh yeah? Who?'
He replied with “his name is Nick.” My name is not Nick." — adamstuartc
12. The flower fail.
"I bought my office crush a rose, not knowing she had two weeks off work. It was left in my locker, but looked good enough to give to her when she returned.
The head fell off as I handed it to her." — s4eaf33066
13. The cupcake thief.
"I spent all day baking red velvet cupcakes for my boyfriend. I went over to his place with these cupcakes in my hand, and his family around, and he looks at me and says 'I don’t think this is going to work out.' He took the cupcakes out of my hands, pushed me out the door, and locked it. I was too shocked to even do anything but leave. I ended up going to the movies by myself because I already bought the tickets." — amys45e8e2ff5
14. The bar tab abuser.
"I was dating a guy on and off and we were 'on again' right before Valentine’s Day. We went to a very nice dinner and he paid. Later, we went out for drinks at our favorite bar and I opened a ta. Thirty minutes later, he disappeared and I found him talking to another girl. When I went up to them, he acted like he didn’t know me and told me to leave them alone. When I closed my tab, the bill was over $200 even though I only had two drinks. The bartender ended up telling me he had purchased multiple drinks for other girls on my tab. Needless to say, we were never 'on again' after that." — emilyd88
15. The dance dud.
"I was in fourth grade and we were learning ballet that year. The first guy I’ve ever had a crush on was my dance partner and our final performance was on Valentine’s Day. He didn’t show up to school on the day of the performance and I had to dance by myself while everyone else was partnered up." — jessicak4d07a7e07
16. The poem problem.
"When I was in 6th grade I had a HUGE crush on a boy. Valentine’s Day rolled around and there was a big dance for the sixth graders. I decided to write him a poem. In front of the entire class, I asked my English teacher to proofread it (she did so in private), and then I asked my friend to give it to him. Apparently he stood up in front of his ENTIRE CLASS, read it out loud, and threw it in the recycling bin. At least he recycled it and didn’t throw it away. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯" — lucyk4cdeef34d
17. The ... well, ouch.
"Last year I had to go for a colonoscopy on Valentines Day. Very romantic." — superginny626