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    Australians Are Explaining What An "Eshay" Is To The Rest Of The World And I'm Cackling

    "If cigarette breathe was a person."

    I recently set a task for the good people of Australia — I sought a definition for the illusive culture of "Eshays".

    So, with nothing but a pixelated image in hand, I asked our Aussie Facebook community to hit me with their best descriptions.

    1. "An eshay will migrate around train stations and shopping centres, whilst wearing Nike TNs, Nautica shirts and Tommy Hilfiger shorts. If you see an eshay but are unsure, look for the signature white cap with a little tiny Nike tick for reassurance."

    "An eshay may be heard vocalising the words 'eetswa' or 'doin lad?'. This is sure a sign you have encountered an eshay. Keep your purse close and your cigarettes closer and do not strike up a conversation if it can be avoided."

    —Emily Williams

    2. "Teens that still breast-feed."

    —Zachary Randrup

    3. "A try-hard chav."

    —Erryn Dundon

    4. "Some little kid that thinks he’s the king of the world, walking around with a handbag and bubbles in his shoe. Will not approach you unless he has 12 other friends with him."

    —Bailey Horgan

    5. "Eshay means sesh in pig Latin."

    —Layla Phillips

    6. "Y’all realise you hate eshays because Murdoch told you to? They’re simply the children and young adults of the working class. Graffiti is a legitimate art form. Y’all just prefer it in your Melbourne alleyways and not where it started: On trains."

    —Sarah van Donkelaar 

    7. "Eshay lad culture is amazing. You're all just jealous because you think you need to own a yacht to be able to wear a Nautica Polo and escape police attention."

    —Julian Skerra 

    8. "If cigarette breathe was a person."

    —Tiana Liyanage

    9. "Little Aussie teenagers who use bumbags and Nike TNs as a form of intimidation. In reality, it's just bad fashion sense."

    —Natasha Tarallo 

    10. "Eshay is pig Latin. Traditionally, it's a group of 'lads' that actually have money and have a gangster-style of wearing higher class brands like Ralph Lauren, Lacoste and Louis Vuitton."

    —Scarlotte Dalton

    11.

    12. "Okay, let me explain 'cause I am one myself — we hang out at train stations, wear a bumbag that carries shanks, spare hat, phone, air pods etc. You also must have the Nike TNs, but the main thing we're probs known for is hanging out at train stations and rolling people for their shoes..."

    —Kynan Newman 

    13. "You'll get hit with any of these statements: 'What ya lookin' at, ya dog?' or 'Etswa brudda!' or 'Fight me, ya dawg' or '(Postal code) for lyfe!' or 'Youse know nuffin' 'bout me!' etc. Basically, fuckwits."

    —Skye Larsen

    14. "The best way for anyone outside of Australia to understand what an eshay is — a cracked-out, wannabe gangster dressed like a tennis player. Will rob anyone for their ciggies and thinks home job tattoos are money well spent."

    —Kai Hagan

    15. "It's literally sesh in pig Latin, which is what we used to use as code so cunts didn't know we were going to have a sesh! It's just made a comeback with the same '90s fashion we used to wear."

    —Bambii Balboa 

    16. "When you dress like a 50 year old tennis coach, but you're only 15."

    —Luke Dwyer 

    17. "They bum smokes and get into fights, usually steal too. They wear the same clothes every day and show off their shoes that are three sizes too big and bright red. They also like wearing expensive things to show off and then complain that they're broke."

    —Cas Mcdonald 

    18. "My favourite eshay experience was when one stole a beanie from my shop, I caught him so he said 'Wanna go outside cunt?' and I was like, yeah, okay, so then he lit the beanie on fire and ran away."

    —Lauren Nguyen

    19. And finally, "Someone who hangs around train stations and shopping centres. They wear bumbags with nothing but a shitty switchblade, a lighter for the durries they pinch and maybe a two dollar coin from Mum for a Macca's frozen coke."

    "Activities: Loitering in public places, riding their scooters, trying to bum darts, shoplifting, riding the train while playing Aussie rap at full volume on their Kmart speaker."

    —Taleea Brace

    Want to see the full list or contribute your own definition? Join our Facebook group!