Skip To Content

    21 Things That Are Commonplace For Australians, But Drive Non-Aussies Mad With Jealousy

    Australians: Exist. Americans: OMG I'm so jealous of your life, I can't breathe.

    1. First up, our Cadbury spreadables — including the vastly superior Malteasers Teasers variety.

    omg?! i envy Australians! i want the maltesers spread~~~

    Twitter: @JayLiPops

    This envious person must not be an American, because surely all manner of sin gets turned into a spread there.

    2. The bizarre truth that we are legally entitled to a free portrait of the Queen of England.

    Does anyone know where I can get an official portrait of Her majesty the Queen, kinda jealous the Canadians and Australians get it for free and framed up, I want one too. Anyone know how?

    Twitter: @LKEBRJTI
    Andrew Hastie / Facebook / Via Facebook: hastieandrew

    3. The fact that we reach the new year faster and drunker than the rest of the world.

    I envy australians. They are already shitfaced drunk and ready for bed.

    Twitter: @SupJess__

    4. And Christmas Day...

    I envy Australians.. Australians get Christmas first..

    Twitter: @RootlessYouth

    5. ...And every single day, for the rest of our lives.

    I envy the Australians a little bit. They've already fucked up a day by the time I get to start it.

    Twitter: @_LUMP

    And yes, we know you're technically three hours ahead of us, New Zealand.

    6. Our bomb-ass chips and ice cream varieties.

    2 things I envy the Australians for: Red Rock Deli potato chips and Maggie Beer's Burnt Fig Honeycomb Caramel ice cream

    Twitter: @FionaLutalica
    Instagram / Via instagram.com, Instagram / Via instagram.com

    7. Our culture of "gap years", which sees (privileged) students take a year off between high school and university to travel the world.

    Oh how I envy Australians and their gap years. To be expected to travel a year around the world before returning to work is unbelievable

    Twitter: @deeszn2

    8. Our hot, flakey, deliciously meaty pies.

    @CamMcH @darrenrovell @MrBlairHughes @sixers I envy Australians; all we have here in the US are pot pies, and those range from disappointing to disgusting.

    Twitter: @inkbitspixels

    9. Our jubilant overuse of the word "cunt".

    #OnALighterNote You know who I envy? Australians. You know why? Because they can use the word cunt like Americans use the word motherfucker.

    Twitter: @Ian_SMC

    10. Our birds?

    I envy Australians because they can see parrots in their natural habitat virtually anytime they want. I don't envy the fact they have to put up with magpies though.

    Twitter: @BenjaminDStone
    Daniel Lerps / Via Flickr: dlerps

    11. But seriously, they've really got a thing for our birds.

    I don't envy Australia its snakes and bugs and other fearsome beasts but I sure wouldn't mind some of those birds https://t.co/lTEcFZag7P

    Twitter: @SavvyTroll

    12. Our sexy accent, which turns simple phrases into elongated, overly-voweled nonsense.

    @ all Australians I envy you for having such a hot accent

    Twitter: @datIuis

    13. Our endless array of travel opportunities.

    Travel envy. Wow. #Australia 🐫🐪🐫

    Twitter: @jenamsims

    14. Our stellar weather, beaches and general merriment.

    I envy Australians Beaches Parties Weather Fun and all we get is a look at fucking 'Neighbours' Evil sods bahahahaa

    Twitter: @Stirgryguy

    15. Our tennis matches?? I dunno, this is getting strange now.

    I envy Australians, all those tennis tournaments in your country for 2 months?! Naaah, this life no balance.

    Twitter: @Phatill

    16. Our Tim Tams, obvs.

    Twitter: @silvana_sultana

    17. The (not entirely truthful) discourse spread by celebrities that we all wake, surf, then begin the rest of our day. #RiseSurfRepeat

    so with this i also learn that joel edgerton and chris hemsworth have relatively the same habit: waking up at 5-6 am and go for a surf or any other physical activities. i envy the aussies so much.

    Twitter: @scottinaussie
    Matrix / GC Images

    18. The fact that we get to celebrate Christmas in blistering heat. Take that, Bing Crosby.

    I envy Australians who celebrates Christmas in summer.🎄🌞 It's tremendously freezing here in the northern hemisphere. 😑❄☃

    Twitter: @stephyip_xx

    19. The fact that we gave the remarkable Jonathon Swan to the rest of the world.

    @JonathonSwan , one more reason to love (and envy) the Aussies https://t.co/yTNzOVtsKT

    Twitter: @JayneBuchwach1

    20. The razzle dazzle light display offered by our summer thunderstorms.

    One thing I do envy about Australia is their summer thunderstorms. Those things are a sight to behold

    Twitter: @Mighty_Kites

    21. And finally, our divine sunsets — because nobody does it better.

    "@wwwdot5sos: #youknowyoureaustralianwhen you get amazeballs sunsets like this 💕🙌 " This is why i envy Australians

    Twitter: @Gelyn_lyn