Ah yes, the sweet torture of public transport. Sometimes you might make it to your destination unbothered, while on other occasions, you might arrive covered in toenail clippings — thanks to a passenger behind you who decided to trim their nasty talons en-route.
So, in an effort to establish some ground rules for taking public transport in Australia, Reddit user u/hobgoblinfruit asked their fellow Aussies: "What are your public transport pet peeves?"
Commenters wasted no time coming back with some strongly worded dos and dont's for travelling by bus, train, tram or ferry.
Here are some of the best responses:
1. Don't store bikes in front of the carriage doors.
"Bikes themselves are fine. But the location is less than ideal."
2. Don't smoke — and that includes vaping.
"My pet peeve is people who vape on public transport. Just because it's less gross than cigarettes doesn't make it not-yuck.
Literally saw a girl recently on a bus who was considerate enough to pull up her mask between individual puffs and exhales of her vape. Shame she wasn't considerate enough to just wait five minutes until she got off for a vape."
3. If a carriage or bus is crowded, move into the aisles and all the way to the back — don't just block the doors.
"People who don't move into the aisles on a full train enrage me. And people who don't let others get off the train before boarding."
"This one infuriates me. Just selfish and oblivious to the world around them. The thing is packed and there's room to get on, but you can't because everyone is packed near the doors. Yet, you politely ask them to move in and you're the arsehole!"
4. Don't play TikToks and music at full blast without headphones.
"No one else wants to listen to your goddamn awful fucking music/videos. Be polite and considerate and think of others, it's really not that hard!"
—u/Kay_Hawk
"It's just so rude! How ignorant do you have to be?! No one thinks your music's cool or your video's funny. I get major cringe and secondhand embarrassment with it. And I usually get so frustrated I'll move carriages."
5. And the same goes for phone conversations — mute 'em.
"What's with people being on speaker phone and holding the phone to their mouth and then leaning in to listen?! Bro, you're 99% of the way there, just turn off loud speaker and put the fucking speaker near your ear!"
6. Don't treat the bus, train or ferry ride like your own personal space.
"My pet peeve is dirty people — ones who clip their nails on the train or bus, socks taken off when they are sitting and people spitting mucus. Putting their feet on the seat is another one!"
—u/moodyfoody11
"Yesterday, I sat behind some lady removing nail polish and then painting her fingernails on the packed peak hour train. Acetone smells like shit and in an enclosed space with those fumes, it’s just fucking selfish."
7. Keep your legs closed — you don't need to spread your knees like you're in labour and getting ready to push.
"The amount of people (let's be honest, men) who I see spreading their thighs wide across two seats drives me nuts! I'm not asking you to sit permanently with your knees clasped tight, but just bring it in a few inches, christ!"
—u/[deleted]
8. Always be ready to tap on and off, so you don't cause unnecessary queues.
"I hate people who don't have their Opal card ready to tap at their stop and hold up the whole bus unlocking their phone, opening the app etc."
—u/ironflab
"Can we all agree to just have our cards ready to tap on and off? The amount of people fumbling and searching pockets at the exit makes me so mad!"
—u/[deleted]
9. If it's crowded, keep your possessions off the seats — don't be the arsehole who doesn't let other passengers sit down.
"Why do people think that their bags are more deserving of a seat than other passengers?"
—[deleted]
10. Never leave your rubbish behind.
"I get so annoyed with people who leave behind their coffee cup/burger wrapper/crumbs/used tissues. Mate, use the BIN."
—u/ComplexMoth
"Tradies who are so desperate for a drink that they (not very discreetly) chug a cold one and then get off and leave the bottle ratting around the carriage, dripping beer, for the rest of us to enjoy."
11. If it's a hot day, please wear deodorant.
"My pet peeve is people who think deodorant is an optional extra, especially in summer."
12. Never take photos of someone without their permission.
"I hate creepers who take pictures of people who are doing nothing wrong."
—u/starcaster
"And people filming and then uploading it to social media — for a laugh or for the shock value. It’s creepy and I don’t care if it’s a public space, it’s not cool or nice to demean people, warranted or not. Save it for a verbal story to share without photos."
13. Don't change the direction of a row of seats if it's going to negatively affect another passenger who was sitting down first.
"I hate when I’m sitting behind a rotating seat, and someone sits down two rows in front of me facing the opposite way, pulling the seat with them (so that I go from being in a two seat slot to a four seat bay)."
—u/Simonoz1
14. If it's crowded, don't lean on poles and prevent others from holding on.
"People who lean on poles, so that other people can't hold onto the poles, are the absolute worst."
—u/ParkerQuink
15. If it's quiet and plenty of seats are free, don't elect to sit right next to someone else.
"It's so annoying when someone sits one seat beside/in front/behind me when the whole carriage is empty."
—u/frecklejam
16. ALWAYS stand up for someone who needs your seat more than you.
"My pet peeve is people who refuse or neglect another person who actually needs a seat, may they be elderly or pregnant or disabled. I’ve seen an elderly man give up his seat for a lady who was with her child, because another person refused to give it up — the very person got off at the next stop."
—u/kuro_shir0
17. Don't openly discuss recent spoilers for TV shows and movies — that's dickhead behaviour.
"People who talk about plot spoilers the day after a show airs. Spoiled 'The Red Wedding' for me."
—u/alex__b
18. Before boarding, first allow others to disembark without getting in the way.
"People who try and board the train while a crowd of others are trying to get off are ridiculous. Same goes for people who stand in front of the train doors on the platform. Making it harder for people getting off the train to get past."
—u/frecklejam
19. And finally: If you're in a quiet train carriage, pipe the fuck down.
"I've had colleagues tell me they take work calls in the quiet carriages, because that way they can guarantee there won't be background noise? They can fuck right off."
—u/[deleted]
What are your public transport pet peeves? And are there any other rules you think people should follow for good etiquette? Let us know in the comments below!
Reddit responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.