Skip To Content

    22 Things That Happen When You Don't Drink Beer

    You can keep your frothy wheat bile.

    1. You get a lot of condescending advice like, "Oh, you should try a light beer!"

    20th Century Fox / Via pinterest.com

    2. Or, "You just haven't found the right one yet."

    Warner Bros. Television / Via data2.whicdn.com

    Groundbreaking.

    3. Not to mention the bullshit sexist connotations of not liking beer.

    4. If you're a woman, you're stereotyped as capital-C "Not Chill."

    I’M BASICALLY JUST PRETTY CHILL, she screamed into the void

    5. Whereas if you're a dude who doesn't like beer, people hate on your "girly" drinks.

    ABC Studios / Via Netflix

    6. You roll up to the company happy hour, and your boss hands you a cold one. You want to say:

    Warner Bros. Television / Via reactiongifs.us

    7. But you don't want to be rude, so you take a small sip and try not to grimace.

    Walt Disney Pictures / Via media.giphy.com

    8. Even casual nights in with friends can be rough.

    Warner Bros. Television / Via pinterest.com

    Everyone's knocking back beers...

    9. But who cares? You remembered your trusty bottle of red.

    10. You keep pace all night...and of course, end up wasted.

    CBS / Via giphy.com

    Because wine is like, three times more alcoholic than beer. Whoops.

    11. No one wants to be your beer pong partner if you won't help drink the cups.

    http://dianekeatonfan.tumblr.com/post/95209588947
    http://dianekeatonfan.tumblr.com/post/95209588947
    http://dianekeatonfan.tumblr.com/post/95209588947

    12. And keg stands are a definite no.

    13. But when you're playing Slap the Bag, no bag is safe.

    14. You might overcompensate by taking shots like a champ.

    HBO / Via viralthread.com

    Oh, you want a chaser? That's cute.

    15. Or learning everything there is to know about wine.

    FOX / Via bustle.com

    Or, you know, saying some crap about tannins.

    16. And you know that hard cider is just alcoholic apple juice, and therefore delicious.

    17. You know you can be a picky drinker.

    Disney Pixar / Via tumblr.com

    18. But so what? Your vodka soda is nobody's business but yours.

    19. No matter how many cherries are in your cup...

    Paramount Pictures / Via dinosaurdracula.com

    20. ...or how brightly colored your cocktail is....

    21. ...you know the truth about beer.

    22. And you can get drunk without it juuust fine.

    NBC / Via tumblr.com
    FOX / Via media.giphy.com