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The 13 Types Of Straight Guys You Date In Your Twenties

We've all been there.

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1. The guy who misses his ex but also can't be alone

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He is obviously not over Beverly, but he also doesn't know how to function without a girlfriend. That's where you come in. And while he's "totally over it," Beverly keeps creeping into daily conversations, or ends up subconsciously being a basis of comparison ("Beverly never supported my dreams like you, babe", "Beverly could never finish a full pizza in one sitting like you, hon"). You just want to be liked for you!

2. The all-nighter

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He's a lot of fun, which is why you hang out with him, but his fun also includes staying out all night, getting crossfaded, and maybe peeing on a stranger's car. By the time you actually go home with him, it's already light out and you've just wasted a whole day of your life. And this happens every weekend.

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3. The one who takes like three days to text

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He's a cool guy and when you hang out, you swear he's really into you. He maybe genuinely isn't trying to ghost on you, but dude's gotta do more than text you a "hi" or generic emoji once every few days. There's riveting conversations to be had elsewhere!

4. The baby

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This guy's room is a war zone and you're pretty sure he has no idea how to boil pasta. This is likely a college phase but can hit you at any time without warning. Run fast, giiiiirl.

5. The actual adult

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You think of yourself as smart and responsible and wonder if maybe you just need to date guys who are a little more mature. The thing is, when you date someone about a decade older than you, they actually have a decade or so of more life over you, and will inadvertently make you feel like a baby who doesn't understand how tax returns work or how to tell red wines apart.

But you're also in your twenties. It's normal to be a lil clueless and enjoy drinking Trader Joe's' Charles Shaw blend! Enjoy your youth, child!

6. The "artist"

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You're interested in him because he is interesting, but there is a point where he just starts listing bands and movies you've never heard of for the sake of making you feel less cool, or makes you feel intellectually inferior to him because you have vastly differing tastes. Move on and like what you want to like.

7. The true friend-with-benefits

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This guy is great. You meet up just to have sex and you keep it that way, barring any emotional attachments and proving to the world that, yes, you can have a good time without getting hurt in the end - it's all about honesty and open communication on both ends. You'll feel empowered and in control of your life and it'll be awesome.

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8. The feminist who's not really a feminist

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He tweets Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie quotes and gives Pussy Riot his unyielding support on Facebook. He also occasionally talks down to you and refers to his ex-girlfriend as an "evil slut who dines on the hearts of vulnerable men." You do the math!

9. The guy who keeps asking about threesomes

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He's been meeting you four times a week and you could've sworn you were dating exclusively, but he has a tendency to bring up threesomes as a joke (note: it's never a joke) or reaffirm that he wants to keep this relationship open. You roll along with it for a while for the sake of feeling progressive and independent, but deep down, your heart's definitely been pooped on.

10. Mr. Perfect looking for Mrs. Perfect

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He's handsome! He's ambitious! He's well-read! He only eats organic and likes to go on five mile runs at 7am every morning!

There's just one problem - you yourself are not perfect, and you feel like you're constantly being pushed and prodded into being his dream girl instead of being appreciated for who you are and your own quirks. It's exhausting and makes you feel like a moldy dumpster in comparison. You are NOT a moldy dumpster!

11. The total sweetheart who you’re just not that attracted to

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You'll meet a guy who is really kind to you and even has a lot of common interests - but, for reasons you don't understand, you're just not that attracted to him. Because he seems like a total catch, you might force it for a bit, hoping you'll feel something later. You won't, and it's alright. Let him go and realize that him being nice is not a good enough reason to stay with someone.

12. The great guy you're actually really into

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He makes you laugh, he likes the same Netflix shows as you, and he's really nice to you. You guys go to bone city fairly frequently and he gets on with your friends really well. You have trouble categorizing him as a type of guy, because there's so much to him and he's not all what you expected him to be when you first met him.

13. A bowl of pasta you microwave at 2am

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You come home a little drunk, with a serious case of the munchies. You rummage through your fridge and suddenly remember that you have a half-eaten tupperware of spaghetti just waiting for you. You stare at the noodles with a love that the world has never seen before as you consume them alone, in your underwear, while catching up on Broad City. This is the greatest love of all.

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