27 Orgasms All Twentysomethings Have
The best times have yet to come.
Having your crush become your 11th "like" on Instagram.
Discreetly unbuttoning that top pant button at brunch.
Taking off your jeans/heels/bra/headband the very second you get home.
Hearing the doorbell ring 20 minutes after you ordered Seamless.
Plunging that first spoon into the sleek surface of a Ben & Jerry’s pint.
Opening your bank account and seeing that direct deposit.
Having the song you were JUST thinking about pop up on the radio.
Painting your nail in one stroke and getting it ALL in the lines.
Parallel parking successfully on the first try, in one swift motion.
Waking up a full minute before your alarm goes off.
Having the subway stop so that the door is aligned directly in front of you.
Getting that tax return check in the mail.
Having almost exactly enough left on a gift card for one more Frappuccino.
Getting a check and realizing only then THAT IT WAS HAPPY HOUR.
Peeling an avocado and having it all come off in one piece.
Finishing a box of cereal AND a carton of milk at the exact same time.
Flawlessly scraping out the remains of a Nutella jar with one swoop of your finger.
Secretly wanting to cancel plans and your friend texting you to cancel first.
Having your phone light up with a text right when you were thinking, "Why is no one texting me?"
Deleting your ex's number from your phone.
Finally getting to inbox zero.
Buying clothes without trying them on (out of laziness) and then having them all fit perfectly.
Getting to a movie theater and having no one else sit in your row or need to move past you.
Eating exactly half a restaurant meal, leaving the rest for leftovers.
Pouring wine and having enough left for exactly two generous glasses.
Collapsing into bed and actually having enough time for a quick nap.
And realizing that you have a three-day weekend coming up.
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