If You Just Went Through A Breakup, Here's 13 Pieces Of Advice You Should Hear

"If you spend your time looking at the family and friends of your ex on Facebook it's bad for you, block them all."

BuzzFeed Brazil recently asked readers on Facebook about what's helped them get over a bad breakup — and here's what they said:

Note: All of these responses speak to an individual's own experience and are not to be construed as professional help or advice.

1. "Don't romanticize the relationship you had. If it's over, it's for a good reason."

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Don't blame yourself for the breakup, unless you really fucked things up bad. If you did fuck up, forgive yourself. If the other person wasn't able to forgive you, may you will be able to. We really do make mistakes. Learn from it, and don't keep beating yourself up over it. —Regina Fiore Ribeiro

2. "Set aside a specific time to think about the other person."

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We all know that not thinking about them is impossible, so let's be realistic and set a specific time to get down in the dumps. But then, afterwards, you have to use the time to make happy plans! —Isabela Pires

3. "Don't keep trying to remember what your life was like before the romance."

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Instead, try to think about what you'd like to do next in your life. What things have you always been interested in but never had the time for? This is the chance to invest in yourself!" —anonymous reader

4. "Accept ALL of the invitations that people extend to you."

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Some cousin's kid's birthday party? Go! BBQ at your friend's aunt's place? Go. Movie at your college pal's house? Go. Doctor's appointment with a friend? Go. Grand opening of a butcher shop? Go. Occupy your mind with activities so you can stop thinking about the breakup. Meet new people, talk to different people in different places, and just get yourself change of scenery and energy!" —Fernanda Gibran

5. "I gave myself a post-breakup period to do absolutely everything my heart desired, no holds barred."

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I drank whenever I wanted, went out alone, gave myself a lot of presents, paid for foot massages and spa time, met a lot of people, and got busy with a lot of guys, without getting attached to any of them. The only recommendations from my psychologist were to be careful, not get arrested, and not catch a disease. This period of my life lasted 3 months, but I learned that spending the effort I once made for another person on myself made me happier. And that's how I've been ever since." —Alana Pessoa Luna

6. "I stopped blaming myself for giving love away."

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I learned to understand that no love we give is ever wasted and, that in loving that person, I learned a lot about myself, about the world, about life. Just because it ended doesn't mean that it was in vain. That helped me, particularly in situations where there hadn't been a clear conversation about the reason for the end of the relationship. —Elaine Andrade Barbosa

7. "Try not to keep reliving and mulling over the past."

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I blocked the ex on social networks so as to not succumb to the temptation of sending that "I miss you/still love you/blah blah blah."

Cry all that you need to cry. Try to, by any means necessary, to get out all the pain/anger. I usually write a letter saying everything that I'm feeling and then I burn it, along with the notes, cards and anything else possible related to memories of the relationship.

Keep your friends and family close to help and distract you.

Afterwards, when you're better, learn how to have fun by yourself and be more independent. Be firm. Generally, after some time, that person may come back and says that they are regretful, that they want another chance. Stay strong and tell them to go to hell. Remember that, if it's over, there was a reason, and reactivating it is the same thing as gluing together a broken vase. The marks where it broke will always be there. —Raquel De Oliveira Moscardini

8. "Yes, you will find people who are just as incredible as your ex was!"

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The world is huge, and it's necessary to meet new people in order to realize that, yes, you are going to find someone just as good and maybe even better!" —Sabriany Mendes

9. "One thing that helped me was to make little changes in my life."

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Change your eating habits, take a class, change the wallpaper on your cell phone, cut your hair — it's cliche, I know — paint the bedroom walls ... In the end, this will help you separate the "before" and "after" in your life. It might seem silly, but leaving a relationship gave me a lot of relief in knowing that the ex would never see me with that hair or in those clothes. That helped me to detach myself from who I was for him. —Thaís Scuissiatto

10. Physical exercise is great. Put the pain on the bench, or the leg press!

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Put the sadness on the treadmill and run. That's how I lost 25 of the 30 kilos that I had gained while I was crying. —Gabriela Marçal

11. "Look for friends to chat with. Start doing the little things that you had stopped doing in your friendships all over again."

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I had always been very strong and thought that being dramatic over a breakup was silly, until I went through it and thought I was gonna die. But, I recommend: crying a lot, crying in the shower, on the street, on the bus — my God, I cried a lot on the bus. People even tried to give their seats up for me.

Look for friends to talk to. Go back to doing little things that you stopped doing in your friendships. Soon, you will get to the point where you will realize that no one is going to die because of a breakup and, right there, your life starts to return to making sense. And when you feel ready, kiss a lot of new people, because it's really worth it! —anonymous reader

12. "If you spend your time looking at the family or friends of your ex on Facebook, it's bad for you. Block everyone."

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If they are really important people in your life, you can explain the situation afterwards, and try to make contact again. But for now, focus on what is best for you.

If your former mother-in-law or whatever sends you messages, even with the best intentions, and that hurts you, talk to them and explain that you'll need to pull away at this time, and that someday you all can start talking again, but not now" —Carla Kanamaru

13. "Cry in the shower."

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You don't need to force yourself to do anything. You don't need to erase the pics now, nor burn the presents and even make out with someone new.

Figure out how to occupy your time. Get new things to keep you busy. Don't blame yourself, and definitely don't punish yourself. Cry in the shower, in front of the mirror. Talk about it with someone you trust, or simply write about it. Every time you remember something, say so. Don't keep anything in. Get it all out. — Nicole Morghana

This post was translated from Portuguese.