Hello and happy Monday, my little BuzzFeeders. Welcome back to your favorite weekly post, where I have curated for you only the best of the internet's past weekly fails. Enjoy!
3. This set of texts, from this tweet:

The Barbie one made me laugh out loud.
Drunk lads on the train home from Glasgow were trying to force farts out, trying to do the loudest fart, and the gobbiest one just quietened everyone down ready for his effort... and fully shat himself. Fucking bedlam in the carriage. The smell is awful. People are screaming.
โ She Guevara (@No7Sammy) September 15, 2023
yesterday I was trying to eat tuna out of a can and the cats VERY clearly believed it was cat food and I was so humiliated. they werenโt even begging they just watched me take this can to my bed like bitch you are lost
โ worms cited (@christapeterso) September 15, 2023
I JUST ACCIDENTALLY LOOKED UP "TACTICAL CROCHET" ON THE INTERNET, AND SOMEONE OVER ON REDDIT IS TURNING PEOPLE INTO FREMEN
โ joint chiefs of stuff (@heyMAKWA) September 13, 2023
LOOK AT THIS ARRAKIS DRIP pic.twitter.com/xfp8613fWL
I tried donating blood today. Never again. Way too many questions. Whose blood is that? Where did you get it from? Why is it in a bucket?
โ Helen Ingram (@drhingram) September 17, 2023
โ Julie Klausner (@julieklausner) September 16, 2023
going through old photos why did I make this pic.twitter.com/VS3qGyW4ZW
โ Lolo (@LolOverruled) September 14, 2023
Bro? pic.twitter.com/jcqmu42rLC
โ jestin (@jestingtime) September 13, 2023
โ rare insults (@insultsrare) September 12, 2023
The very first Arthur book is about how Arthurโs nose is perfect the way it is and doesnโt need to be changed. ๐
โ Austin Hargrave (@PeanutButterGmr) September 18, 2023
โฆIn the second book they changed his nose. ๐ pic.twitter.com/BT78VoGV8L
having a sister is something so amazing pic.twitter.com/AANVvpvbeJ
โ a beautiful woman ๐โจ๐๐ฆท (@full_legal_name) September 18, 2023
โ atrophy wife ๐ (@zuza_real) September 16, 2023
The Jungle Book (2016) pic.twitter.com/4jNMP2vWTI
โ Behind The Scenes Pics That Look Like Shitposts (@Behind_Pics) September 16, 2023
โ SNL Hosts Introducing the Musical Guest (@snlhostsintro) September 16, 2023