At last night’s Calgary Flames game, some idiot jumped on the ice in his underwear.
This is stupid in the following ways:
1. He wore underwear, which is not technically streaking.
2. He was forced to continuously make this super badass hand gesture, because walking on ice makes it hard to balance.
3. He rocked bare feet, which means he probably has hypothermia now.
4. The people chasing him had ice skates. Again he did not.
5. And finally, it’s really cold in hockey arenas. So in a word: Shrinkage.
- An NFL player paid tribute to Harambe, the gorilla who died at a Cincinnati zoo, on his cleats.