"If Santo doesn't stop looking at me weird I'll hit him. Don't think I won't."
"Do you know what comes up when you Google this guy?"
"You? I thought I killed you."
"You guys aren't doing it right! This is how a man stands. BOOM!"
"Sorry I'm late fellas. Had to hit the head."
"Waving's for pussies."
"You need to get you some of these glow in the dark teeth, Santo."
"My campaign manager said I should try this pointing thing. Is this right?"
"Ah... There we go."
"I'd put my chances of winning at about..."
I'm a Senior Editor here at BuzzFeed. I'll graduate any day now.
Contact Jack Moore at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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